Hello and welcome to the Top Ten. Due to the shamefully low response to the interactive Top Ten, I have been forced to return to the dull monotonony which is this webpage.

In an attempt to boost ratings, sex has been used to help rouse interest. Therefore this section is probably going to become a permanently sex-related feature; a sad reflection of the way we think - that is, with our reproductive organs.

So please, Mail Dan with your Top Ten things to shout during sex, Top Ten places to do "it", or anything else sinister that I didn't think of.

Now if this doesn't get an e-mail, nothing will.