Match Report

Almondbury Casuals 200-5 (40 overs), Corinthians 200 (40 overs)

Played at Thongsbridge C.C., West Yorkshire, on Sunday 23 June 2002 (In the style of David "the bard" Walker)

The morning sky was tinged with dappled pink as dawn rose over the verdant pastures of the Holme valley. The ten men of Wealdstone lay uneasily in their beds, their dreams disturbed by images of Rod Kelly laughing as he launches another blistering shot to the boundary and the added confusion of Ken's offer to lend them Jim Harris for todays game at the 'Bridge'. They had spent the previous evening dining together at 'La Romantica', an unusual venue one might think for a touring cricket team; but then again, they are from t'South.

(It's no good Dave, I can't keep this attempt at prose up any longer. It's just takes too long and I'm not sufficiently imaginative to keep thinking of diversions into other genres. So back to reality!).

Ken has achieved a seasons first. Before the agreed starting time of 1.30 there are 11 Casuals changed and warming up! Well, that's if warming up includes opening another bottle of Morrisons finest 'special offer' Sauvignon Blanc for the Ladies (the Chairman), playing with his new digital camera (the Secretary), and spending 20 minutes in the khasi relieving himself of last nights 10 pints and a biryani (Burge). Nevertheless, the game starts on time - but not before the teams are introduced to the newly struck Trophy. The 'Jagger-Netherwood Trophy' sees the light of day for the first time and the players are now aware that they are not just playing for fun. Honour is at stake.

The Casuals opening pair stride to the crease full of purpose. Umbers senior caresses the ball with exquisite timing to the boundary as only a 16 stone man can, while Will Ward puts yesterdays first baller behind him and unleashes his square drive. We are off to a flier. It can't last - it doesn't! Will, having got into the thirties goes down swinging. The Chairman surprisingly promoted up the order makes a swift thirteen before being beaten on the third (or was it fourth?) bounce by the 'slower' ball. Umbers continues on his serene way as new batsmen come and go, until he eventually he falls for an excellent 53. This leaves the senior pros, Wilson (14 no) and Priestley (36 no), to see us through to the end of the 40 overs and a decent total of 200 exactly. "Just as I plannned", said Jagger.

Now, at last, the highlight of the day. Jean Jaggers tea. Steve Brown (W.C.C.C.) is helped by two of his teamates to carry his plate to the table and then proceeds to toy with 4 sandwiches, two pies, three pieces of quiche, some stuffed pitta bread, a strawberry tart and a couple of pieces of chocolate cake. The fifth man in the queue is passed by Steve hurrying back for seconds! What an appetite, what a man, what a pony tail!

Following this feast, too tempting to refuse, the Casuals take to the field a little cautiously. The bowlers can hardly run-in and the fielders can't bend - not a good start. Soon the ball is crossing the boundary fence a little too regularly and the skipper is forced to change his attack a little sooner than he had anticipated. At last a breakthrough. However, Mark Horwell, the Corinthians opener is chancing his arm and getting away with it, in no time at all he's passed fifty and the game seems to be slipping away. In a desperate last move the skipper calls back Crossland and Wilson. Cometh the hour, cometh the man, or in this case Rupert. No sooner has Mark completed his century than Wilson the magnificent uproots his leg stump and sends him on his way. But is it all too late? They only need a few to win and still several wickets in hand. Wilson will have none of it, in an inspired spell he takes 3 for 9 in 8 overs, five of them maidens. Panic begins to set in amongst Corinthian ranks as they edge nearer to the winning total. Four overs left and the scores are level; there are still 3 wickets to fall, surely they must do it.

Priestley bowls, a foot outside the off stump, the umpire, somewhat too enthusiastically, calls wide! An outcry. Their batsmen decline the win in such a controversial way and we continue. Priestley completes a maiden. Last over. The skipper is in a quandry; who can he con into bowling the last over under such intense pressure. All the regular bowlers have completed their allottment, who can he turn to in his moment of need? "There's nobody else Greg, you'll have to do it". Thanks Ken. All 9 fielders are crowded round the bat, the crowd is hushed in anticipation, the Trophy is at stake, Mike Matthews (batsman) looks nervous, the weight of expectation sits heavily on his shoulders (got the picture?). I bowl, he misses, he's plum in front. Steve Brown, now umpiring, apologetically gives him out. I promise him an extra helping of cake. Next man in is Geoff Morley, he doesn't look confident, for a start he's wearing a helmet and I'm bowling! Two balls later history repeats itself. Last man in now, two balls left and they still want one to win. The fifth ball is blocked. The last ball ……Noel Kenning, Wealdstone President pushes it to Burge and sets off, what a mistake. Burge picks up and throws the ball in one easy, athletic movement (at least that's how he described it later) to the non-strikers end, the bails are off and the batsman is out by yards. Is it a tie? Or do we re-instate the 'wide' and allow them the win? It certainly felt like a win to the Casuals.

Hands were warmly shaken as yet another close encounter came to an end. Beer was bought and drunk amongst much good spirits and the Jagger-Netherwood Trophy presented for the first time. Who won? Well - cricket of course.

Just one final postscript. The day had been earmarked, as last year, as an occasion for the 'older' Casuals to meet up and join the players in celebrating cricket the Casuals way, and of course to enjoy Jeans splendid tea. I am sorry that so many were unable to attend, but I'm very grateful to Andy Shires who did. I hope he won't be left on his own next year.