BEING A BLOKE IS BEST

Being a bloke is best because....

Your bum is never a factor in a job interview

Your last name stays put

The garage is all yours

Wedding plans take care of themselves

Car mechanics tell you the truth

You don't care if nobody notices your new haircut

People never stare at your chest whilst talking to you

New shoes don't cut, blister or mangle your feet

Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with 'So, notice anything different about me today?'

You can throw a ball more than five feet

One mood.... all the DAMN time!

A five-day holiday requires only one suitcase

You can open your own jars

You can go to a public toilet without a support group

You can leave a hotel bed unmade

Everything on your face stays its original colour

You can quietly enjoy a ride from the car passenger seat

Three pairs of shoes are more than enough

You don't have to clean your flat if the electricity meter is due to be read

You can sit in silence watching a football game for hours with your mate, without thinking 'he must be mad at me'

You don't pinch another man's chips

You can drop by to see a friend without bringing a gift

If another guy shows up at a party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong friends

You are not expected to know the names of more than five colours

The same hairstyle usually lasts for years, if not decades

You are unable to see wrinkles in your clothes

Your belly usually hides your hips

Christmas shopping can be accomplished for 25 relatives on Christmas Eve in 40 minutes

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