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CRY FOR HELP
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CRY FOR HELP
Dear Technical Department,
Recently, I upgraded to Girlfriend 1.0 from DrinkingMates 4.2. But Girlfriend 1.0 was incompatible with LadsNightOut 3.1 and Football 4.5, and I could only bear to run it with the sound turned off. It also frequently rearranged all my files without asking. When I tried to dump Girlfriend 1.0, it shredded my Wardrobe 3.0 and Football Matches 4.5.1 sub-programmes and wrecked several Windows.
A shareware program, Slapper 2.1, promised much but left a nasty virus in my system, forcing me into a temporary shutdown. Then I tried to run GirlFriend 1.1 and Girlfriend 1.2 at the same time, but when these two systems detected each other they caused severe damage to my hardware.
I eventually upgraded to Fiancée 1.0, but this automatically upgraded itself to upgraded to Wife 1.0, which uses up all my available resources and can be very costly to run. Any mistakes I make are automatically stored in Wife 1.0's memory and cannot be deleted. Furthermore they are instantly recalled whenever Wife 1.0 activates its Moods.pdf file, which blocks all other activities.
Wife 1.0 also needs updating regularly, requiring ShoeShop Browser, Norton AntiAge and Hairstyle Express which need to be reinstalled almost every other week. Also, when Wife 1.0 attaches itself to my Ferrari 04 Convertible, it often crashes.
Worst of all, Wife 1.0 is prone to attack by an irregular but persistent virus. When HormonesPMT strikes, which it can do at any time and without warning, the behaviour and performance of Wife 1.0 varies from erratic to downright frightening.
Recently I've been tempted to install Mistress 2006, but I am told that if Wife 1.0 detects Mistress 2006, it tends to delete all of your cache before uninstalling itself.
Please help.