REMEMBER,
REMEMBER...
REMEMBER,
REMEMBER...
Two alternative views of the famous attempt to blow up the Houses of Commons in 1605.
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THE GUNPOWDER PLOT
EXTRACTS FROM ROBERT'S DIARY
Name: Robert Catesby
Religion: Catholic
Job: Gentleman (rich enough - just - not to have to work)
1567: Heard Lord Henry Darnley has been killed. His house was blown up, and his body found outside. Strangled. Hmmm. His wife Mary Queen of Scots (who was probably behind it) has been chucked out of Scotland, and their son James, aged one, made king.
1570: The Pope has told all Catholics to kill Queen Elizabeth - but she’s too popular, worse luck. But when she goes James of Scotland should be the next king. He’ll be nicer to us.
1598: Bad news. William Cecil, the Queen’s main adviser, is dead. I should be happy, as he hated us Catholics, but he’ll be replaced by his son, who’s a right smarmy little individual.
1603. The Queen is dead. Good riddance.
1604: Disaster! King James, who we were all sure would be so much nicer to us Catholics than Elizabeth was, has turned out just the same. Even worse, I’m deep in debt. Now what?
April 1605: Have decided to take over the country. We need to destroy the King, his sons, the House of Commons and the House of Lords. They meet once a year, at the State Opening of Parliament (October 15). Me and a few mates will seize the king’s daughter Elizabeth, force her to marry a Catholic and - most importantly - get her to cancel all my debts. Easy!
May 1605: Have managed to get a gunpowder expert, Guido Fawkes, over from Holland. Have got some gunpowder, but not enough. Pity you can’t just buy it down ye corner shoppe!
June 1605: We started digging the tunnel that will get us under the Houses of Parliament.
August 1605: The cellars directly below the House of Lords have been put up for rent, as the king is strapped for cash. God is clearly on our side. I’ve rented a cellar for six months.
September 1605: Told you God was on our side. Just when it looked as if we wouldn’t have enough gunpowder for the Opening, it gets put back to October 29. Prepare for the Big Bang!
26 October 1605: Whew! Just our luck that, on the day we were about to move the gunpowder into the cellars, a group of soldiers sets up camp within sight of our tunnel entrance. But our luck is STILL in! The Opening has been put back another week, to November 5, as James is ‘in the country’. The 'country' will miss him - NOT!
4 November 1605: Whew! The king's soldiers searched the cellars tonight and found Fawkes there, but didn’t recognize him. The Plot is on. Fawkes will spend the night there, ready to light the slow fuse (which takes eight hours to burn) in the small hours tomorrow morning.
5 November 1605: DISASTER! That rotten king ordered a second search, they found Fawkes, and will now torture him until be blabs on us. Am leaving London. Quickly.
8 November 1605: We've fled London, and our clothes are drying by the fire... uh oh. Where did I put the spare gunpowder? Not in our pockets..... KABOOM!!!! Aarghh!!!
THE GUNPOWDER PLOT
EXTRACTS FROM ROBERT'S DIARY
Name: Robert Cecil
Religion: Protestant
Job: Secretary of State (sort of prime minister), just like his dad William was to Elizabeth I
1567: I see Lord Henry Darnley has been found dead outside one of his palaces, which blew up in a gunpowder explosion. Strangled. His wife Mary Queen of Scots (who was probably to blame) has been chucked out of Scotland. Their son James, aged one, is now king. Good.
1570: The Pope has ordered English Catholics to kill Queen Elizabeth. I don't think so!
1598: Dad has kicked the bucket, so now I’m in charge. Wish the old Queen wouldn’t keep calling me her pygmy, though! I can’t help being short!
1603. The Queen is dead, and James VI of Scotland is now King of England. Hmm. Some Catholics actually hope James will be nicer to them. Not if I‘ve got anything to do with it.
1604: Hampton Court Conference. Persuaded James not to be nicer to the Catholics.
March 1605: Have tricked this Catholic twerp, Robert Catesby, into attempting to blow up the king when he opens parliament. Since gunpowder was used against his dad, James will be scared stiff! Catesby agreed to it in return for me paying off his debts, and granting his a free pardon. Of course I shall have to kill him, just so he doesn‘t talk..
April 1605: Have arranged for some gunpowder to ‘disappear’ from official government lists. I am so evil! Catesby has started digging a tunnel to get under the House of Lords.
May 1605: Have arranged for a gunpowder expert, an exiled Englishman called Guido Fawkes, to return from Holland. Tunnel progress pathetic; what are they using- teaspoons?
August 1605: Told John Whynniard, the man in charge of parliament, to put the cellars directly below parliament up for rent. How easy do I have to make it for these daft Catholics?
September 1605: Delayed the Opening of Parliament from October 15 to October 29, to give the plotters more time to get enough gunpowder. You just can’t get the plotters these days!
26 October 1605: Bother! Frank Tresham, the spy spying on Catesby for me, sent a letter to his cousin Tom Monteagle telling him not to attend the Opening. Luckily Monteagle brought it to me, so I can keep it quiet. Have delayed the Opening again, this time to November 5.
4 November 1605: Showed the letter to His Majesty, who ordered the cellars searched. The soldiers found Fawkes there, but didn‘t arrest him. Idiots!
5 November 1605: A second search. Yes!!!!! That idiot Guido Fawkes was found with the gunpowder. He's been arrested (not before time!) Unfortunately I had to have John Whynniard, the man who let the plotters have the cellar, murdered, just in case he blabbed.
8 November 1605: Catesby and his mates have been gunned down at Holbrooke House in Northamptonshire today. Fawkes has been hung, drawn and quartered, Tresham is in the Tower (he’ll have an accident very soon) and the other plotters are all dead. I am SO smart!
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