Revd Gordon Benfield, our previous Vicar at Sherbourne and a ringer, returned from a very cold visit to Moscow (Feb 1999). Here he is in front of the Tsar Bell, the biggest bell ever cast. I suppose it is a relief to tenor-grabbers that is is definitely never going to be rung because a big piece broke off as it was being taken out of the mould. The bell was made in 1735 and cracked soon afterwards. It has never been rung. It is called The Tsar Kolokol bell; it is 20 ft (6.14m) high and weighs 223 tons! Suitable candidate for a caption competition? Ted says, 'Don't do it, Gordon!'

Michael Ashton suggests 'Now, who's going to turn the tenor in for a touch of Plain Bob Maximus?'