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SOCIAL
DISTINCTIONS IN THE COUNTRY
Elderly Sportsman. "I say, boy, just tell me where
the meet inn is, will you?"
Boy. "Well, there's the Wheeler's Arms on the green
where the cyclists and the motor folks goes, but where the
gentry mostly goes is to the Fox and 'ounds up the town."
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LONG
FELT WANTS IN THE HUNTING FIELD
A mechanical fox, to draw off the foot-people.
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THE
ORDEAL BY WATER
Testing position of an amateur huntsman who has promised the
brush to the lady of his choice.
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Dealer to
distinguished foreigner, who is buying a horse). "Well,
'ow do you like 'im?"
D.F. "I like not his leaps."
Dealer. "Well, I'm sure 'e ain't a sticky 'orse."
D.F. "Sticky? No, he is not enough sticky. When he
leap I do not adhere!"
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(Two cubs
have been "chopped" in covert.)
Superior youth (whose habiliments suggest another sport - to
friend). "By Jove! I didn't come out to see foxes killed
in this sort of way!"
M.F.H. (overhearing). "So I thought, by the look of
you, Sir. But, if you do manage to shoot one, you'll show my
huntsman where to gather him won't you?"
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THE POINT TO
POINT SEASON
Excited Countryman (to Huntsman, who is keeping the
course). "There's one of them in the water! It's that
gent what runs the Temperance Club. 'Ain't you better go and
'elp 'im?"
Huntsman (not an abstainer). "Oh. 'e's all right.
'E's in 'is helement!"
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NO MAN A
HERO TO HIS SERVANT
Second Horseman. "Do you 'appen to 'ave seen my
guv'nor? Stout party on a grey 'oss"
Boy. "Dunno; but 'ounds and unters and all's gone
over 'ere ten minutes ago, runnin' 'ard."
S.H. "I'm all right then. 'E'll be along shortly."
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AN
EXCHANGE OF HOSPITALITY
(Drama
in Two Acts)
"One man's meet is another man's poison"
I.
Major Heavysides has been mounted by Captain Chaseover on
what the later regards as "the best horse in the
stable."
II
Captain Chaseover has been mounted by Major Heavysides on
what the later regards as "the best horse in the stable."
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