IFO
- one of the oddest (and stupidest) conspiracy theories is the
Apollo moon landings hoax, whereby NASA is accused of faking the landing
missions in a film studio (see
Faker Fox). This daft idea poses a problem
for those whose interests also include UFOs. The Apollo astronauts are
supposed to have witnessed several UFOs - but if they never went to the
moon the UFO pictures, such as
this one, must
have been faked as well. 80 is sure that the kind of folk who fall for this
stuff can no doubt reconcile this paradox - belief in mutually
contradictory things is something we humans are good at. NASA can help
resolve the "mystery" of one UFO sighting, that from an Apollo 16
movie. John
Young, Thomas Mattingly and Charles Duke were returning from the Moon
after their mission and shot the movie which some claim shows "a
saucer-shaped object with a dome on top." A team at Johnson Space Center's
Image Science and Analysis Group has now analysed in depth the 16mm movie
frames depicting the apparent object and has concluded it was certainly part
of a space vehicle - in this case the Apollo 16 command module itself. It
turns out that the UFO was a
boom and floodlight mounted on the vehicle to
aid with EVAs (spacewalks). Naturally this explanation will not convince
the diehard types, besides, they have plenty of other "UFO"s they can waste their
time on. Talking of waste, one wonders how much it cost to examine these
photos using the expertise of the Image Science and Analysis Group, purely to refute
something that was pretty idiotic in the first place?
Small but -
perfectly formed. 80 does not return to many of the sites mentioned
in these pages, there just isn't enough time, but there are a few that
repay repeat visits to see what has been added. Just such a site is
Language Miniatures where the presentation is plain
but the content is excellent. LM consists of a series of small essays,
each one on a facet of English and also some other languages. They are not
only written with a great deal of knowledge but also with a light, and
often witty, touch. The range covered is wide, featuring subjects such as
Our Indo-European Ancestors which examines the latest research on where
many languages originated, introduces the wonderful sounding but now
defunct study of glottochronology, and looks at the current use of genetic
techniques to study the history of tongues. There are now
132 essays on
the site on dialects, accents, cliches, pronunciation and much more. One
essay likely
of interest to readers of 80's maunderings is
The Language of Paradise,
subtitled Myths of the confusion of tongues. It examines legends other
than the Judaeo/Christian story of Babel, from Australia, Africa and India
which "explain" the profusion of human languages. Another is
Language as a
Lens which looks at "whether the structure of a person’s language
constrains or influences how that person thinks." which definitely has a
bearing on many subjects covered here on this site. A favorite is an essay
80 has mentioned before, called
The Eskimos' 100 Words for Snow - "The
assurance that “The Eskimos have 100 words for snow” has become an
ineradicable part of the English language. Few are troubled by the fact
that it is not based on any factual reality." It is good to hear that
there is now a book version of Language Miniatures illustrated by the
author, William Z. Shetter, a retired university professor of foreign
language and linguistics, which features 59 essays. Highly recommended.
Noah's Nonsense
- It has been noted before that those who push the literal creationist
view of the origin of the world and its inhabitants, human or animal, like
to preach to the very young. The hope, it is assumed, is that at such an
impressionable age when great trust is placed in adults and the things
they tell you,
the discrepancies and idiocies in the creationist case will be accepted
unquestioningly (see
Creationist Cartoon Capers). Most websites in favor
of the creationism delusion are based in the US but here is one that
proves the British can be equally daft -
Noah's Ark Zoo Farm (NAZF)
which uses a petting zoo to draw in the punters. In
common with other sites of this type they make a sketchy attempt at
"fairness" by comparing "Creation or Darwinist evolution?" and make the
unlikely claim that "Noah's Ark Zoo Farm may be the only place in the
world where both views are stated fairly, side by side for people to make
their own minds up." It is amusing to note yet again, owing to the
popularity of dinosaurs with kids, (in part thanks to Jurassic Park and
sequels) the Biblical view of creation has to include these beasties. In
fact the portrayal of the creationism in NAZF borrows more than a little
from the language of biology and evolution. Also the timescale would not
find favor with other believers as it has the creation of everything by
God in 21000 BC, which is surely heretical. Noah's flood happens in 19,000
BC, the recovery from which resembles a garbled version of evolution
itself! This must be what is meant by "Scientific Creationism".
(Annoyingly the NAZF folks have chosen to put the comparative
evolution/creation chart in PDF format which means if you magnify it enough
to be able read the text you can hardly see one paragraph at a time, and
nothing of the big picture.)
Biology Made Stupid
- The most worrying aspect of the whole site
is the Creation Biology section which is described as an "Introduction for
schools and others who are using this site for creationist biology". This
assumes that schools are actually teaching this drivel in a science class
instead of one devoted to religious education (which would be regrettable enough). These
clowns have no trouble using evolutionary mechanisms - except where they
collide with dogma, then some tinkering has to be done. Animals spread
and evolved, but only in a limited way - that is from just two of each type
of original,
so "Two cats became 36 species, from lion to domestic cat. Two snakes
became 2035 species, some venomous, some not." One wonders
what these ur-cats would have looked like - kitties or cougars, pussies or
panthers? And did the ur-snakes have legs (like the one in the Eden myth)
- for some modern snakes have vestigial limbs? (Science confirms Bible
story!) It all sounds so simple -
as in simple-minded. Far too neatly, the irrefutable presence of fossils in
ancient rocks is explained by saying "the fossil record contains the story
not of how life began, but of how the world recovered from the wipe out."
which was, if you were paying attention, Noah's Flood in 19,000 BC. There is a disclaimer on
the site which states "Images contained on this site are used for the
purpose of scientifc (sic) discussion." Discussion maybe, but hardly scientific.
Schools Beware - the NAZF site
uses the unoriginal
ploy of portraying the theory of evolution as a mere belief in order to
promote its own, err, belief. The site's promoter also
seems to think Eldredge and Gould's
Punctuated Equilibrium is a rival to Darwinian
Theory, instead of an idea, a suggested mechanism within the theory. This is part of the
"reasoning" for claiming Darwinism is but one possible explanation and
that creationism should have a place in school science classes. This
is deeply worrying as the British government is far too keen to involve religious
organizations in the education system already - and this at a time when the country is more
secular than ever. Private sponsorship of schools is welcomed by the
government as it obviously helps with finances, which must be why they
seem to care little that children are being taught
theology as science.
Blair's government repeatedly states that education is a priority - it
seems that so long as it is cheap, the quality of the education matters
little. To those that poke fun at US creationist sites (80 pleads guilty
to numerous offences) it does not pay to assume such idiocy is confined to
that country - nor is the insidious attempt to peddle religion in a
science class. It is possible that these attempts have been, if not
triggered, certainly given more urgency, by the fact that there is now a
body of opinion that feels, quite rightly, that the teaching of religion
in schools is
inappropriate in a secular Britain. In order to maintain a
toehold in young, impressionable minds, unscrupulous religionists such as
the perpetrator of the Noah's Ark Zoo Farm are creeping into science
classes. NAZF, and others like them, for all their bleating about balance,
only seem to want the Genesis creation myth(s) taught as fact - there are
plenty of others - but for the fundamentalist Christians it is
a case of "not
invented here therefore not interested". To expect anything else from these
hypocrites would be hopelessly naive. (If you have need of some ammo in
the fight against creationist ignorance and bigotry take a look at the
wonderful
Things Creationist's Hate)
This next section is a slight departure from the usual 80 fare and is
unlikely to be a regular feature. The first item is a nightmare, hopefully
balanced by the second, more optimistic view.
If This Goes On
- " He was in a despondent mood, it seemed that his world was
coming to pieces. Having lost his job for failing a
polygraph test, he was
having little success finding other work. The last two positions that he
had gone for both turned out to be a bust. The first company turned him
down because their resident graphologist determined by handwriting analysis
that he was not the person they wanted. The second attempt at employment
with another firm had gone to two interviews, a hopeful sign, when he was
rejected on the grounds that he was not
astrologically suited to working
with the present staff. All of their horoscopes meshed nicely and on the
basis of his reading it was decided he would be a disruptive influence. He
thought that it could get no worse when a plain brown envelope landed on
his doormat - it was a court summons. Apparently he had been named by one
of his now grown-up daughters as an abuser when she was a child. Although
there was no truth
or evidence of this, bar the buried memories a therapist had "recovered"
from his daughter's subconscious, that alone was enough to result in the
summons to appear before a judge. He sat disconsolate, a cup of coffee in
hand, watching the jabbering TV news. This provided no relief -
interspersed with adverts for tarot readings and reiki the main item was
about the death of
the last gorilla - protection from poachers having been withdrawn. This
was part of a new wholesale destruction of many species, particularly
primates, which began after it was officially acknowledged that human
beings had a separate creation from the dumb beasts. The item that
followed did nothing to lift his spirits, being an announcement that the
hundredth country so far had accepted a system of
religious law, and the
cameras captured the celebratory beheadings, broadcast from a football
stadium, now used for this very different sport."
A Kind of Faith
- When you declare yourself a skeptic, or more particularly an
atheist, some of the common questions asked are, what do you put your
faith in, what drives you, what is the basis for your morality? It has
been argued convincingly
elsewhere that religious faith is not necessary
to lead what most people would regard as a "good life", (application of the
Golden Rule requires no divinity -
after all we made up God just as we made up all
of his commandments - good and bad. To do right out of fear of divine
punishment is not being moral - it is just about saving your skin/soul. ) But what about
longer term hopes? This is where I have to confess what may well appear to be
an irrational belief of my own, in a better future for humankind.
If This Goes On (see above) is the encapsulation of recurring nightmares of a world that
could exist - a frightening and uncertain place, and it seems to me, a
place that could be reached too, too easily from where we are today. If I
can do something to combat the trends and beliefs that lead to such a
world I think I should - in fact to me it is a moral duty. Some days
though, there is a feeling that the game is just not worth the candle and
this is where faith comes in. Faith, according to the New Shorter Oxford
Dictionary can be " Confidence, reliance, belief esp. without evidence or
proof." The faith that I profess is not belief in some supernatural
creator, mysterious energies, or angels, to name some typical instances.
My faith is in the power of the scientific method and the application of
rationalism. It is the kind of faith that assumes that the sun will rise
each day - on past evidence a fairly safe belief. The general public's
opinion of science is not that high currently - based often on the
confusion between science and technology and politics. The scientific method in which I
place my faith is, as far as I know, the only self-testing and
self-correcting human endeavor. An example is needed, even a trivial one.
A while back news reports made much merriment over the announcement by
astronomers at Johns Hopkins University that the light from the universe,
when all frequencies are averaged, shows that the cosmos is a shade of
turquoise. Once everybody had recovered from the excitement of this
revelation the same team announced that, owing to a software glitch, the
true color is beige. This was greeted with much hilarity by the press
-first turquoise, now beige, what are those whacky eggheads and their
software up to? What they were up to was admitting an error and correcting
same, publicly and loudly. I am hard pushed to find a parallel in the two
areas that dominate our world - politics and religion.
Scientific Evangelism - but surely I am wrong in stating confidence in scientific rationality is
my faith - its effectiveness is proven. No, where the faith lies is in
believing that humankind will learn to apply scientific principles and
critical thinking to the way we conduct our lives and in our attitude to
others. Faith of this sort is certainly needed when confronted by such
things as the current US administration and the creeping
introduction of fundamentalist Christianity into government (the US Attorney
General and his
office morning- prayer meetings is a trivial but telling example); the
current British government's championing of "faith-based" schools; the
chilling medieval world view of a violent fundamentalist Islam. These
examples only deal with religion, without even addressing the negative
attitude to science prevalent in the mainstream media and the widespread
acceptance of psychic charlatans, con artists and quacks. The next time my
doorbell rings and, on opening the door, a smiling face is revealed, or
more usually two faces, bursting with the urgent need to tell me of their
faith I shall say, "By all means, tell me of your faith and then
afterwards I will tell you all about mine." This is at least more polite
than my usual answer
" No, thanks, I am not superstitious" and might, just might win me a
convert.
Christian Commerce
- this is the third in an occasional look at the lucrative opportunities
in the bizarre market for religious memorabilia. This time, thanks to the
Ethical Atheist, a collection of merchandise is waiting for your awed
appreciation of the artistic heights achieved by the religious trinkets
market. (This collection has grown since 80 last visited - look out
especially for Cheesy Jesus). If
you see nothing there to tempt you, how about a piece of rock? Or to be
more exact a
Quiet Stone ( Luke 19:37-40) These appear to be literally that, a lump
of stone with perhaps an embedded alarm clock and an "amusing" motto. This
bunch obviously needed to shift product after the collapse of the
Pet Rock
market. Looking at the
Testimonials page they seem to have had no trouble finding fresh
dupes. "The kids loved them-I gave them as gifts to 6th graders moving up
from our "SuperChurch" program." A kid is happy to be given a rock? Not
exactly a PlayStation is it? This stone thing seems to be catching on -
you can also buy stones
from "The Cave of the Nativity is the birthplace of
Jesus. Nativity Stones are small stones from inside this cave, placed into
gold and silver." They have missed a trick here - frankincense and
myrrh would surely add to the authenticity. Celebrity endorsement of the
Nativity Stones comes from Ricardo Montalban, confirming that
Fantasy Island does exist, right between his ears.
Freethinking
- As a counter to the above nonsense take a look here at
Freethought for the Day courtesy of
the Freedom from Religion Foundation.
On the day 80 looked the page featured Mary Woolstonecraft, Ulysses S
Grant and Edward Gibbon. The latter had this to say,
“ A state of scepticism and suspense may amuse a
few inquisitive minds. But the practice of superstition is so congenial to
the multitude that, if they are forcibly awakened, they still regret the
loss of their pleasing vision. Their love of the marvellous and
supernatural, their curiosity with regard to future events, and their
strong propensity to extend their hopes and fears beyond the limits of the
visible world, were the principal causes which favoured the establishment
of Polytheism. So urgent on the vulgar is the necessity of believing, that
the fall of any system of mythology will most probably be succeeded by the
introduction of some other mode of superstition. ”
Quotes
"The folly of mistaking a paradox for a discovery, a metaphor for a
proof, a torrent of verbiage for a spring of capital truths, and oneself
for an oracle, is inborn in us."
Paul Valery
"I have yet to see any problem, however complicated, which, when you
looked at it in the right way, did not become still more complicated."
Poul Anderson
"If you don't preach religion in my school, I won't think in your
church." Anon.
"The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those
who have not got it."
George Bernard Shaw
"I stayed up all night playing poker with tarot cards. I got a full
house and four people died."
Stephen Wright
"A friend of mine is into Voodoo Acupuncture. You don't have to go. You'll
just be walking down the street and . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
oohh, that's much better." Stephen Wright
(If you have any suitable quotes for this section please
send them to 80 - the email link to do so is at the bottom of the home
page.)
