Line Of Sight

LINE OF SIGHT

Q. Whats the definition of 'Endless love'?
A. Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis.

Well it need'nt always be that way...
[As we are now in the 21st Century, I had better apologise to all of you who are 'visually impaired' and were offended by the opening line. Although, to be honest, I think I have my finger on the pulse as far as these things are concerned and it takes a lot more than a vulgar off the cuff remark from a middle class wideboy to get a blind persons dander up. And to prove a point, I would ask those of you who are blind and were offended to e-mail me - call me cocksure, but I'm pretty sure I won't hear from a single soul]

That brief detour through the politically correct minefield has actually turned out rather well, as it ties in nicely with a theory that I have been working on for the last few years, which is this: I believe that blind people are 'visually impaired' - not 'visually bereft' and that there is hope for the future for restoring full eyesight, so to speak.

For example, your normal everyday Joe has sufficient three dimensional sight to get him through his day: crossing roads, opening doors and eating burgers.

However, a small percentage of people have only two dimensional sight, which, while perfectly adequate for reading and writing, can lead to a daily routine of 'You've Been Framed' proportions, as they cannot judge distances between objects. Fortunately this can be treated by ensuring the patient wears glasses with one red lens and one green lens.

Now I believe that most 'blind' people have one dimensional sight. which means that while they can see, they just cannot judge distances between objects or distinguish the objects themselves. The graph on the right illustrates just how much worse a blind persons sight can become if left untreated (I think the time is probably in years, although its hard to tell as the digits are all blurry - it looks like it was done by Stevie Wonder)

Now all I have to work out is how to maximise the meagre visual resources of the blind and I'll make a mint.

The End.

What do you mean I did'nt 'prove' anything...I did say it was only a theory... I did'nt mean to lead anyone up a blind alley.


		Saturday, 27 April, 2002
		LINE OF SIGHT Q. Whats the definition of 'Endless love'? A. Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder playing tennis. Well it need'nt always be that way... [As we are now in the 21st Century, I had better apologise to all of you who are 'visually impaired' and were offended by the opening line. Although, to be honest, I think I have my finger on the pulse as far as these things are concerned and it takes a lot more than a vulgar off the cuff remark from a middle class wideboy to get a blind persons dander up. And to prove a point, I would ask those of you who are blind and were offended to e-mail me - call me cocksure, but I'm pretty sure I won't hear from a single soul] That brief detour through the politically correct minefield has actually turned out rather well, as it ties in nicely with a theory that I have been working on for the last few years, which is this: I believe that blind people are 'visually impaired' - not 'visually bereft' and that there is hope for the future for restoring full eyesight, so to speak. For example, your normal everyday Joe has sufficient three dimensional sight to get him through his day: crossing roads, opening doors and eating burgers. However, a small percentage of people have only two dimensional sight, which, while perfectly adequate for reading and writing, can lead to a daily routine of 'You've Been Framed' proportions, as they cannot judge distances between objects. Fortunately this can be treated by ensuring the patient wears glasses with one red lens and one green lens. Now I believe that most 'blind' people have one dimensional sight. which means that while they can see, they just cannot judge distances between objects or distinguish the objects themselves. The graph on the right illustrates just how much worse a blind persons sight can become if left untreated (I think the time is probably in years, although its hard to tell as the digits are all blurry - it looks like it was done by Stevie Wonder) Now all I have to work out is how to maximise the meagre visual resources of the blind and I'll make a mint. The End. What do you mean I did'nt 'prove' anything...I did say it was only a theory... I did'nt mean to lead anyone up a blind alley.	If you can read this you're too close