E-mail:			Here christiandivorce.info teaches:- Marriage involves people becoming "one flesh", and so their unity is intended to last as long as their bodies. The "one flesh" can only last as long as our physical bodies and so ends on death. There is no marriage in heaven. "One flesh" is a reference to sex, even when the sex is immoral. "One flesh" unions can be dissolved, so being one flesh is no obstable to divorce. You can be "one flesh" with more than one person, so this is no obstable to remarriage. When you are married you have a duty to be "one flesh" with your spouse, so denial of sex can be a biblical ground for divorce.   Artwork provided courtesy of artist, James Theopistos and BibleVerseArt.com If you have any questions, please feel free to contact us.

The Biblical use of "one flesh" as a concept has much to teach the modern Christian contemplating what the Bible says about divorce. On the one hand, it emphasizes the life-long nature of the marriage commitment. We marry "until death us do part" - binding our bodies, our flesh, together while those bodies live. The commitment then, is generally envisaged to end on death, and not until then. There is no marriage in heaven.

Some people say that people cannot divorce because Christ said "they are no more two, but one flesh". They argue that the union is permanent, and indissoluble. Or they say that people cannot remarry after divorce because they are still "one flesh" with someone else.

However, the Bible shows that the idea of "one flesh" can be abused, and therefore that it does not necessarily mean a permanent union.

"One flesh" is described by Paul in Ephesians 5 as part of a "mystery" - that is, a truth whose meaning is only made known by the full revelation of God. The "one flesh" that the Bible describes is figurative of the union between Christ and the Church, and shows that a husband must love his wife as Christ loves the Church, and that a wife must submit to her husband as the Church must submit to Christ.

When it applies to people, "one flesh" is a clear reference to sexual union. It is what a husband does with his wife (Genesis 2 v 24), but it is also what a man does who is joined to a harlot (a prostitute) (1 Corinthians 6 v 16). This means that even immoral sexual union outside marriage constitutes "one flesh".

For this reason we can say that a "one flesh" union definitely does not prevent the people involved from being "one flesh" with someone else. Think about it. If a prostitute is "one flesh" with all her customers, then suddenly she is one flesh with many different people. If that can happen, as the Bible suggests, then there can be nothing to stop someone who was "one flesh" with their first husband or wife, but who is now divorced, from becoming "one flesh" with their second husband or wife. It is scripturally possible. That does not answer the question of whether or not it is 'right', but it does mean that it cannot be objected to on the grounds of "one flesh" only being possible with one person.

Another important point to draw from this is that "one flesh" is not the same thing as marriage. If a man used a prostitute, and his "one flesh" union with her was marriage, then she would be married to many different men. Yet we know from Romans 7 that a woman could not be married to more than one man at once. Also, if he was married to her, he would have duties towards her, including the duty of sex. Those who argue that "one flesh" is marriage are then forced into saying that all of a prostitute's customers are married to her, and that they all owe her sex - even though she is another man's wife, and this would be adultery. This absurdity helps to demonstrate that "one flesh" is not the same thing as marriage.

This therefore answers a question that some Christians have. If they have sex with someone, are they married to them? No. They were one flesh. It is a serious situation, and sinful to become one flesh outside of marriage - but it is not marriage.

Marriage is more than sex, but it involves sex, which is why married couples have authority over each other's bodies. They owe it to each other. If they do not provide it, they have broken their obligations, and effectively deserted their partner. In Exodus 21 this was sufficient reason for a woman to be allowed to leave her husband, and in 1 Corinthians 7, Paul shows that the obligation applies to both husbands and wives. Therefore, the concept of "one flesh" means that refusal of sex constitutes biblical grounds for divorce.

Some people go beyond this to say that the idea of "one flesh" involves monogamy - mostly because Christ quotes the Greek Septuagint which adds the word "two" to the sentence about a man becoming one flesh with his wife.

As we have seen, this is unwarranted, as a prostitute can be one flesh with more than one man. Also, in 1 Corinthians 6, Paul compares this to Christians being "one spirit" with the Lord. The Lord can clearly be "one spirit" with Paul at the same time as being "one spirit" with other Christians, so it is clear that this "one-ness" is not exclusive or monogamous.

Similarly, in Romans 7 v 4 and in 2 Corinthians 11 v 2, the Bible states that many believers are one with Christ in a marriage relationship. In Romans Paul tells them that "ye" (plural) "should be married to another, even to him who is raised from the dead" and in 2 Corinthians 11 v 2 Paul states that he "espoused you" (plural) "to one husband", before going on to treat the church as one bride. Therefore, the Bible does not link "one flesh" with monogamy, and it does not limit remarriage in this way.

The "One Flesh" scriptures and the duty of marriage

Genesis 2 vv 21-24 ²¹ And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; ²² And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. ²³ And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. ²⁴ Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Matthew 19 vv 4-6 ⁴ And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, ⁵ And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? ⁶ Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

Mark 10 vv 6-9 ⁶ But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. ⁷ For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; ⁸ And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. ⁹ What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

1 Corinthians 6 vv 15-17 ¹⁵ Know ye not that your bodies are the members of Christ? shall I then take the members of Christ, and make them the members of an harlot? God forbid. ¹⁶ What? know ye not that he which is joined to an harlot is one body? for two, saith he, shall be one flesh. ¹⁷ But he that is joined unto the Lord is one spirit.

1 Corinthians 7 vv 2-5 ² Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. ³ Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. ⁴ The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. ⁵ Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency.

Ephesians 5 vv 22-33 ²² Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. ²³ For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. ²⁴ Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. ²⁵ Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; ²⁶ That he might sanctify and cleanse it with the washing of water by the word, ²⁷ That he might present it to himself a glorious church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing; but that it should be holy and without blemish. ²⁸ So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies. He that loveth his wife loveth himself. ²⁹ For no man ever yet hated his own flesh; but nourisheth and cherisheth it, even as the Lord the church: ³⁰ For we are members of his body, of his flesh, and of his bones. ³¹ For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. ³² This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. ³³ Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.

If you have any questions, please feel free to contact us.