E-mail:			Here christiandivorce.info teaches:- Jesus defined marriage as "what God has joined together". God made laws which prevented certain people, like close relations, from marrying each other, and today we demand that such relationships end. God has clearly and firmly told believers, in both testaments, that they may not marry unbelievers. God used Ezra to cause believers to "divorce" unbelievers they had "married". This rule holds true today. The Bible clearly allows for divorce where a true Christian disobeys God by marrying a non-Christian, whether or not there has been any other sin. People often miss this point because they misunderstand what the Apostle Paul wrote about a different topic.   Artwork provided courtesy of artist, James Theopistos and BibleVerseArt.com   If you have any questions, please feel free to contact us.

Jesus defined marriage as "what God has joined together".

When Jesus was questionned about divorce he quoted God's gift of Eve to Adam in Genesis, where they married and became one flesh, and answered that men should not separate "what God has joined together". He therefore showed that God has instituted marriage and that the beginning and end of marriages lies with him, not with the decisions of men. But in his definition of marriage as "what God has joined together", Jesus was very precise in a way that explains other scriptures that many people often miss or ignore.

In the example he was quoting it was obvious that God had joined together Adam and Eve, because God had given Eve to Adam and specifically created her for him. There was no-one else to choose from and Adam couldn't have made a mistake in accepting Eve as his wife. In fact, Adam's case is used as an example even in situations where it is not so obvious that God wants you to marry one particular person, because it lays down a rule about a man being united to his wife and becoming one flesh.

God made laws which prevented certain people from marrying each other, and we honour these laws today by demanding that such relationships end.

We can sometimes assume that everything that looks like a marriage is protected by Jesus statement, but on closer examination it is clear that it only applies to "what God has joined together". This is not a controversial statement. It is probably believed by every Christian you have ever met. Take the following example:-

If a man was to go through a marriage ceremony with his sister, or with his mother, or with any relation with whom the Bible says he is forbidden to have sex, we would say that he wasn't really married, and if they lived together as man and wife, we would call this sin, and demand that the relationship was brought to an end. If the law of the land recognised this as a marriage we would still say that they were not really married and that there needed to be a divorce.

Christians take this stand because the Bible expressly forbids these sexual relationships in Leviticus chapter 18. The people involved have ignored the biblical law, but it still applies. The Bible and those who follow it do not accept the marriage as valid because the commandment of God shows that God did not join these people together. Therefore there is no problem with saying that they must separate. Fortunately the laws and morals of many nations recognise this and treat such relationships in a broadly similar way to that seen in the Bible.

Christians also believe this for the following example:-

If two men go through a ceremony with each other, recognised by the government as a "marriage" or its equivalent, and if they maintain that their homosexual relationship is a marriage, we would call this sin, and demand that the relationship was brought to an end. If the law of the land recognised this as a marriage we would still say that they were not really married and that there needed to be a divorce

We would take this stand because the Bible is clear (in Leviticus 18 again as well as elsewhere) that such a sexual relationship is forbidden by God. As his law clearly bans a marriage in this case, no one could reasonably claim that God had joined these two people together, and so they could not claim that their sinful relationship is covered by Christ's words against divorce. Regrettably the moral decline of many nations means that such relationships are treated as desirable, and are even granted legal recognition, but Christians still refuse to recognise them.

God has clearly and firmly told believers in him that they may not marry unbelievers.

However, while many Christians stop there, it is clear that God has also given us laws which not only ban incestuous or homosexual marriage but which also ban other types of marriage. One of the most important for Christians to be aware of today is God's insistence that his people may only marry each other and may not marry non-Christians. Just as God has banned marriages between certain close relatives and between men, he has also banned marriages between Christians and non-Christians.

This rule is clear in both the Old and the New Testaments.

Deuteronomy 7 vv 1-4 is one of a number of similar prohibitions God places on his people, essentially telling them not to marry those who are unbelievers. There the reference was initially to the unbelieving tribes in the land that the children of Israel were about to conquer, but other scriptures in the Old Testament show that the sin was in marrying unbelievers, and that the consequences of marrying unbelievers was that those who sinned would be drawn away from the worship of the one true God. See Exodus 34 vv 15-16; Joshua 23 vv 12-13; Judges 3 vv 6-7; 1 Kings 11 v 2; Ezra 9 vv 1-2 & 10 vv 10-12, and Malachi 2 v 11 to explore what God thinks of intermarriage with unbelievers.

This command is applied in the New Testament to the church. This includes specific instructions to Christian widows that they may only marry Christian men (1 Cor 7 v39), and the general command to not be "unequally yoked" (bound together in an unequal partnership). This is in 2 Corinthians 6:14:- "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers", and establishes that it is still a breach of God's command for a believer to marry an unbeliever.

God used Ezra to cause believers to "divorce" unbelievers they had "married".

Many Christians are surprised when they read chapters 9 and 10 of the book of Ezra, especially if they have read it before without realising what was going on. In that passage, Ezra discovers that people had sinned by breaking the laws mentioned above, and taking unbelievers to be their wives, in direct contradiction to the law. Ezra did not say "It's too late - we'll have to live with it- you're married already!" - but instead said "Now therefore make confession unto the LORD God of your fathers, and do his pleasure: and separate yourselves from the people of the land, and from the strange wives." There then followed a mass divorce where these women were put away. There is no suggestion that the women had broken their marriage contract - the problem was that the men had married women who they were not allowed to marry, and Ezra told them to divorce them. In fact he described it as God's "pleasure" that this should happen.

It is worth pausing briefly and considering what the Bible says about "husbands", "wives" and "divorce" so that we do not confuse matters by introducing modern concepts. Both in the Old Testament and in the New Testament the words used for "man" and "husband" are the same word, and the same applies to the words for "woman" and "wife". This means that when the translators use the word "wife", they could often just as easily used the word "woman" instead, and so when we read in the English translation that these women in the book of Ezra were wives it does not imply that the God views the marriages as valid. So we can't say "God calls them wives, so they must really be married", because this is just an issue of translation.

Similarly the most common term for divorce in the Bible is "to put away" and refers to a woman being sent away from the house. There was no requirement to get anyone else to recognise the legality of the act, not even a court. When a woman brings the marriage to an end the Bible talks of her "leaving" her husband's house. Again, she didn't need to get a decision from a court.

This means that there are essentially two ways of thinking about the passage in Ezra. Either the people were really married, but God required them to get divorced, or they were living together in a relationship that was not a valid marriage and God required them to finish it. In some respects the distinction is academic. God told them in the Bible not to do it - they did it anyway - and God required them to stop it. This is a great distance away from the attitude of some that a marriage between a Christian and a non-Christian has to be tolerated once it takes place. Ezra's example is clear. It has to end, and the divorce that results is pleasing to God.

This rule holds true today. The Bible clearly allows for divorce where a true Christian disobeys God by marrying a non-Christian, whether or not there has been any other sin.

The rule given by Moses and the practice that we see in Ezra were never overturned in the New Testament. In fact, the only difference is that it is even more clear that the distinction is based not on the membership of any national group, but on faith. This was true also in the Old Testament but examples like the book of Ruth show us that marriage between different national groups was acceptable when the non-Israelite became a follower of God. So when God forbade marriage to the people of other nations he explained that it was because they followed other gods and would turn Israel away from God. This happened again and again and contributed to Israel's eventual downfall.

So, in the New Testament the rule is reinforced by statements which apply it to Christians not marrying unbelievers and by appealing to the general principle of the separation of light from darkness. Instead of a change, there is only further backing for the rule.

It is worth noting however that just as the Bible regulates marriage, and that may mean something different from the common understanding today, that the same applies to the word "Christian". Whatever church a person goes to, or whatever beliefs they subscribe to has no impact on whether they are what the Bible recognises as a Christian. To be a Christian, that this command applies to, means that you must have repented of your sins and exercised faith in Jesus Christ, the one and only God who became man.

If when you got married you were not a Christian in this sense, then you must remember that for one non-Christian, however religious, to marry another non-Christian is not in-itself an act of disobedience to God, and therefore that this rule does not apply to such a case. In fact, it is this point which is vital in understanding why so many churches are confused about this point.

People often miss this point because they misunderstand what the Apostle Paul wrote about a different topic.

In 1 Corinthians 7 Paul the Apostle gives the longest single discussion on marriage and divorce in the whole Bible. As the Bible is consistent, and as it says of the law given to Moses that "the law of the Lord is perfect" (Psalm 19), it is unsurprising that what Paul writes there is completely in line with the Old Testament law and with what Jesus had said in the Gospels. despite this, many people approach what Paul wrote as if he was disagreeing with what had gone before, or sometimes they read it without the benefit of reading the law that Paul, as a Jewish Rabbi, had based his life on.

In verses 12-16 of that chapter Paul speaks of a married couple where one person is a Christian and another is a non-Christian. He advises the Christian not to break up the marriage but to try to live at peace with the unbeliever. But, if the unbeliever insists on bringing the marriage to an end, then the divorce is allowed.

To many, this seems to be a different rule than that given and applied in the Old Testament. That is not surprising, because it applies to a different situation.

We are often reminded by pastors and teachers about another important teaching about divorce, and that is that we should never divorce a Bible verse from its context! We can only understand what is being taught when we read the words that surround it and describe the situation it applies to.

It is clear on each of three levels of context that this passage is not talking about Christians who disobeyed God by marrying unbelievers, but is instead referring to people who were already married when they became Christians but their partners did not.

These sitiuations appear similar because they both result in a Christian being married to a non-Christian, but there is a vital difference because the first way this can happen is a result of sin, whereas the second way it happens is a result of salvation.

This second group, who Paul talks about in 1 Corinthians 7 were married as unbelievers. One was then saved and wondered whether he should stay with his unsaved wife. This is different from the group we have been considering because no command was broken - God joined them together when they were unbelievers and there is nothing to stop unbelievers marrying each other. Therefore they can stay together - unless the unbeliever wants to leave. So this is really a completely different case.

The proof of this is in the following three levels of context.

1. The immediate context. The very next verses, 17-24, explain this teaching as referring to the state people were in when God called them, and why it is desirable to stay in that state, and only rarely to change it. With reference to marriage this means that if you were married to an unbeliever when you became a Christian your marriage and your children are legitimate, and you shouldn't try to leave the situation. God called you when you were married - so try to stay married.
2. The wider context of the teaching to the Corinthians. Paul brings the chapter to an end by reminding us of the restriction on who Christians may marry. In verse 39 he talks about widows, who could choose who they wanted to marry. Paul supports this freedom but says that they may marry "only in the Lord". They were free, but they were only free to marry other Christians. And in case this wasn't clear enough Paul made the point again in his final letter to the Corinthians - "Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers". (2 Cor 6 v 14)
3. The context of the rest of Scripture. Paul's comments could not contradict the law of God and the practice of the saints. As the faith of Abraham and Moses is the same faith of Peter, Paul and ourselves, it is clear that Paul was not overturning the law. In fact, elsewhere it will be shown that he was merely applying another part of the law of Moses. The example of Ezra remains a good example for Christians today.

In summary:-

• If you are a true Christian and you marry a fellow-believer, there is no sin.  You have done what was right.
• If you were married as an unbeliever, and became a believer, and stay with your unbelieving spouse, you are doing right.  You might win him or her to the faith. But if your unbelieving marriage partner decides to leave you for no good reason, such as because you are following the Christian faith, then they are free to leave and you are free to remarry. You have done nothing wrong.
• But if you entered into a relationship that was against the moral law, you would be expected to quit it.  We recognise this applies to prohibited relationships between men and other men, and between people and animals. In the same way it applies to a marriage where a Christian disobeys God by marrying a non-Christian. It is not a marriage that God has joined together, and so it can and should be separated.
• God is ready to forgive Christians who sin against him by breaking his rules of marriage. But not only does he provide forgiveness in this case - he also provides a way out of the problem and back towards the way he wants you to love.

In New Testament times it was perhaps rare for such intermarriage to occur - but now it is all too common - and it is a detail that people often leave out of their stories because people have been shy about teaching it. If we remembered God's commands and took them seriously on this it would make a lot of the divorce "problems" a lot easier to solve...

P.S. - God has "disavowed" immoral wedding vows

This whole procedure echoes the law in another important respect. In Numbers 30 we read of the law relating to women taking a vow. The law of Moses states that in certain circumstances a father could cancel vows made by his daughter and a husband could cancel vows made by his wife on the day he became aware of those vows. Those vows would be unenforceable, and of no effect. It is interesting that despite New Testament exhortations not to use vows many weddings still include vows to God. But Christians are bound in relationships to God, both to the Father as children and to the Son, Jesus Christ, as the bride of Christ. Therefore God is in a position to cancel these vows if he makes it clear that he does not support them, and he has made this clear in the Bible. God does not expect Christians to keep vows to him which he has already disavowed in his Word. Therefore marriage vows made between a Christian and a non-Christian are of no real effect.

Genesis 2 vv 21-24 ²¹ And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; ²² And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. ²³ And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man. ²⁴ Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

Exodus 34 vv 15-16 ¹⁵ Lest thou make a covenant with the inhabitants of the land, and they go a whoring after their gods, and do sacrifice unto their gods, and one call thee, and thou eat of his sacrifice; ¹⁶ And thou take of their daughters unto thy sons, and their daughters go a whoring after their gods, and make thy sons go a whoring after their gods.

Numbers 30 vv 3-8 ³ If a woman also vow a vow unto the LORD, and bind herself by a bond, being in her father's house in her youth; ⁴ And her father hear her vow, and her bond wherewith she hath bound her soul, and her father shall hold his peace at her: then all her vows shall stand, and every bond wherewith she hath bound her soul shall stand. ⁵ But if her father disallow her in the day that he heareth; not any of her vows, or of her bonds wherewith she hath bound her soul, shall stand: and the LORD shall forgive her, because her father disallowed her. ⁶ And if she had at all an husband, when she vowed, or uttered ought out of her lips, wherewith she bound her soul; ⁷ And her husband heard it, and held his peace at her in the day that he heard it: then her vows shall stand, and her bonds wherewith she bound her soul shall stand. ⁸ But if her husband disallowed her on the day that he heard it; then he shall make her vow which she vowed, and that which she uttered with her lips, wherewith she bound her soul, of none effect: and the LORD shall forgive her.

Deuteronomy 7 vv 1-4 ¹ When the LORD thy God shall bring thee into the land whither thou goest to possess it, and hath cast out many nations before thee, the Hittites, and the Girgashites, and the Amorites, and the Canaanites, and the Perizzites, and the Hivites, and the Jebusites, seven nations greater and mightier than thou; ² And when the LORD thy God shall deliver them before thee; thou shalt smite them, and utterly destroy them; thou shalt make no covenant with them, nor shew mercy unto them: ³ Neither shalt thou make marriages with them; thy daughter thou shalt not give unto his son, nor his daughter shalt thou take unto thy son. ⁴ For they will turn away thy son from following me, that they may serve other gods: so will the anger of the LORD be kindled against you, and destroy thee suddenly.

Deuteronomy 24 vv 1-4 ¹ When a man hath taken a wife, and married her, and it come to pass that she find no favour in his eyes, because he hath found some uncleanness in her: then let him write her a bill of divorcement, and give it in her hand, and send her out of his house. ² And when she is departed out of his house, she may go and be another man's wife. ³ And if the latter husband hate her, and write her a bill of divorcement, and giveth it in her hand, and sendeth her out of his house; or if the latter husband die, which took her to be his wife; ⁴ Her former husband, which sent her away, may not take her again to be his wife, after that she is defiled; for that is abomination before the LORD: and thou shalt not cause the land to sin, which the LORD thy God giveth thee for an inheritance.

Joshua 23 vv 12-13 ¹² Else if ye do in any wise go back, and cleave unto the remnant of these nations, even these that remain among you, and shall make marriages with them, and go in unto them, and they to you: ¹³ Know for a certainty that the LORD your God will no more drive out any of these nations from before you; but they shall be snares and traps unto you, and scourges in your sides, and thorns in your eyes, until ye perish from off this good land which the LORD your God hath given you.

Judges 3 vv 6-7 ⁶And they took their daughters to be their wives, and gave their daughters to their sons, and served their gods. ⁷ And the children of Israel did evil in the sight of the LORD, and forgat the LORD their God, and served Baalim and the groves.

1 Kings 11 v 2 Of the nations concerning which the LORD said unto the children of Israel, Ye shall not go in to them, neither shall they come in unto you: for surely they will turn away your heart after their gods: Solomon clave unto these in love.

Ezra 9 vv 1-2 ¹ Now when these things were done, the princes came to me, saying, The people of Israel, and the priests, and the Levites, have not separated themselves from the people of the lands, doing according to their abominations, even of the Canaanites, the Hittites, the Perizzites, the Jebusites, the Ammonites, the Moabites, the Egyptians, and the Amorites. ² For they have taken of their daughters for themselves, and for their sons: so that the holy seed have mingled themselves with the people of those lands: yea, the hand of the princes and rulers hath been chief in this trespass.

Ezra 10 vv 10-12 ¹⁰ And Ezra the priest stood up, and said unto them, Ye have transgressed, and have taken strange wives, to increase the trespass of Israel. ¹¹ Now therefore make confession unto the LORD God of your fathers, and do his pleasure: and separate yourselves from the people of the land, and from the strange wives. ¹² Then all the congregation answered and said with a loud voice, As thou hast said, so must we do.

Nehemiah 13 vv 23-27 ²³ In those days also saw I Jews that had married wives of Ashdod, of Ammon, and of Moab: ²⁴ And their children spake half in the speech of Ashdod, and could not speak in the Jews' language, but according to the language of each people. ²⁵ And I contended with them, and cursed them, and smote certain of them, and plucked off their hair, and made them swear by God, saying, Ye shall not give your daughters unto their sons, nor take their daughters unto your sons, or for yourselves. ²⁶ Did not Solomon king of Israel sin by these things? yet among many nations was there no king like him, who was beloved of his God, and God made him king over all Israel: nevertheless even him did outlandish women cause to sin. ²⁷ Shall we then hearken unto you to do all this great evil, to transgress against our God in marrying strange wives?

Malachi 2 v 11 Judah hath dealt treacherously, and an abomination is committed in Israel and in Jerusalem; for Judah hath profaned the holiness of the LORD which he loved, and hath married the daughter of a strange god.

Matthew 19 vv 3-6 ³ The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause? ⁴ And he answered and said unto them, Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, ⁵ And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? ⁶ Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

Mark 10 vv 2-9 ² And the Pharisees came to him, and asked him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife? tempting him. ³ And he answered and said unto them, What did Moses command you? ⁴ And they said, Moses suffered to write a bill of divorcement, and to put her away. ⁵ And Jesus answered and said unto them, For the hardness of your heart he wrote you this precept. ⁶ But from the beginning of the creation God made them male and female. ⁷ For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; ⁸ And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. ⁹ What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.

1 Corinthians 7 vv 8-16

⁸ I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I. ⁹ But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

¹⁰ And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband: But and if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.

¹² But to the rest speak I, not the Lord: If any brother hath a wife that believeth not, and she be pleased to dwell with him, let him not put her away. ¹³ And the woman which hath an husband that believeth not, and if he be pleased to dwell with her, let her not leave him. ¹⁴ For the unbelieving husband is sanctified by the wife, and the unbelieving wife is sanctified by the husband: else were your children unclean; but now are they holy. ¹⁵ But if the unbelieving depart, let him depart. A brother or a sister is not under bondage in such cases: but God hath called us to peace. ¹⁶ For what knowest thou, O wife, whether thou shalt save thy husband? or how knowest thou, O man, whether thou shalt save thy wife?

1 Corinthians 7 vv 17-24

¹⁷ But as God hath distributed to every man, as the Lord hath called every one, so let him walk. And so ordain I in all churches. ¹⁸ Is any man called being circumcised? let him not become uncircumcised. Is any called in uncircumcision? let him not be circumcised. ¹⁹ Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing, but the keeping of the commandments of God.

²⁰ Let every man abide in the same calling wherein he was called. ²¹ Art thou called being a servant? care not for it: but if thou mayest be made free, use it rather. ²² For he that is called in the Lord, being a servant, is the Lord's freeman: likewise also he that is called, being free, is Christ's servant. ²³ Ye are bought with a price; be not ye the servants of men.

²⁴ Brethren, let every man, wherein he is called, therein abide with God.

1 Corinthians 7 vv 39-40

³⁹ The wife is bound by the law as long as her husband liveth; but if her husband be dead, she is at liberty to be married to whom she will; only in the Lord. ⁴⁰ But she is happier if she so abide, after my judgment: and I think also that I have the Spirit of God.

2 Corinthians 6 vv 14-17 ¹⁴ Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness? ¹⁵ And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? ¹⁶ And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people. ¹⁷ Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,

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