8 good reasons why I place my lists here rather than elsewhere

1: Badgers are forcing me to do it with handguns.
2: My lists will break your mind without an effective pink casing.
3: I want people to look at my website.
4: Darth Vader made me do it!!!!!!
5: I am a pitiful sex pervert who enjoys getting people to....oh.....ooooh yes thats goooooood.
6: I link wiping my semen from the bottom of this desk
7: I want the queen to come and live in my house.
8: I am a big box of hate.

8 people who should be put in the big brother house.

8 tv program ideas

8 failed Hollywood films

1: "Minced Face Party" sample dialogue:
Creepy guy: Ha ha ha, I'm going to mince your face RIGHT OFF
Fat slut woman: Oh no how terrible, arrrgghhh!
Creepy Guy: Now dance to the pulsating beat of my VARIOUS GARDEN IMMPLEMENT!!!
Fat slut woman: Well...what sort of beat is that anyway?
Creepy guy: It's a sort of pulsing crazy beat. RAAARGH!
Fat slut woman: I'm not really scared now that you've got your cock out.
2: Bill and Teds Anal Sex FANDANGO!!! the poster for which features Bill and Ted standing side on with their jeans 'round their ancles, giving a cheery thumbs up as Bill fucks Ted in the ass!
"Oh Bill, dude, that's really fucking excellent"
3: Hair of the dog" Meg Ryan's performance as an alchoholic beastophile, while challenging, proved not to be the box office gold many people (who work for film studios and spend 16 hours a day getting cocaine blown into their eyeballs by special cloned camels) thought it would be.
4 Seal Fight Club more uncomprimising drama as Brad "fucking pecks" Pitt tries to build an elite cadre of ninja conspirators (out of a load of immature grown men with no apparent self esteem) with the intention of destroying the world with the clever ruse of organising clubs to watch seals fight. When that doesn't work he tries getting people to fight for the oportunity to club seals. He tries to take the idea to the next level by getting people to have fights with seals in a club but then they run out of seals. The end.
5: "Airplane 3: fuck it all to hell, why are we bothering with this shit. And I clearly said DON'T CALL ME SHIRLEY. Alright?"
6: The Frock Even in a dress Sean connery is a kick ass motherFUCKER. So why oh why didn't they cast him in this sequel to "The Rock"? Presumably because a shop dummy with a painted on mustache is cheaper and doesn't distract all the ladies in your high end trailer.
7: Muslim Apocalypse 2047 Possibly slightly ill judged scifi war film casting a group of Islamic terrorists as the wild eyed rebels fighting the evil American Empire all over the world. One leading marketing expert commented that this film demonstrated "a mild misunderstanding of the North American film market"
8: Phlegm like flubber but staring Sigourney Weaver as a scientist who makes cute little creatures out of a huge vat of her own spit.

8 excuses for romantic tension in a TV series

1: The central characters are a dolphin and a shark.
2: The secondry characters keep throwing bricks through the windows of the parents of the two central characters and blaming it on the other one.
3: The man howls at the moon.
4: The woman eats crisps all fucking day.
5: A homeless man wanders around behind the central couple all day yelping. Romanticly.
6: A gigantic ants nest sits in the middle of the set and the queen ant controls everyone with her matriarchal mind pincers.
7: He's a lowly desk clerk and she's the head of a major company.
8: He has teeth in his nose and she's allergic to teeth.

8 totally made up names that should probably not be used for characters in TV series

1: Tozzle Mifflenidge
2: Thrasker Ttaank
3: Bigbolbous Prutuberator
4: Afflejasper McScotsfiend
5: Clapron Gungle
6: Hask Snups
7: Cuckolery Cuckenham
8: Joaquim Baffletodney

8 characters in the style of Remington Steele

1:Tarzan McNight
2: Jesus Christ
3: Hope Carry
4: Corpse Buttocks
5: Polyp Jungle
6: Zed Eckspectrum
7: Cope Coop
8: Slit Fingered