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Why was it they never seemed to have straightforwardly dull
missions? Other teams came back from being off-world complaining
about the tedium of soil sampling and mineral surveys, but it seemed
as though SG-1 always drew the short straw. They were bona fide
trouble magnets, that had to be the explanation for it.
This one had seemed like it would be uneventful, just a trip through the forest, until one of the locals appeared, terrified out of his mind. It had taken a moment for them to get enough information from him to realize that danger was rapidly approaching, and that a hasty retreat to the 'Gate was a damn good idea. Sadly, the idea had been unfulfilled. The next thing they knew, they and their new friend were surrounded by darkness, pinned by spotlights like bugs on a board, a sentence of imprisonment being pronounced by faceless voices. After that, suddenly they were somewhere else, thrown through the Stargate to a primitive planet without a DHD. Since Rothman was already injured, whether he wanted to admit to how it had happened or not, Jack insisted that he stay close by. The last thing he wanted was to get the reputation of being careless with his civilians, and to get another one killed. Daniel, at least, had some kind of survival instincts, compared to Rothman at least. He'd get the truth out of him, Jack figured. It looked like they were going to be stuck here together for a little while, and what better way to pass the time than interrogating Rothman? He glanced across at Rothman, catching him looking back, and their eyes met for a moment before Rothman glanced away. What was that? Jack stopped, turning to Rothman - he couldn't help noticing the way Rothman flinched slightly at the sudden movement. "I'm the last person you need to be scared of here, Rothman," Jack said, keeping his voice low enough not to travel to where Carter and Teal'c were, a few paces ahead. Rothman looked unconvinced. "Just because some people round the SGC don't like civilians on the front- line teams...." Rothman laughed, the harshness of it making Carter and Teal'c turn back, a puzzled look on Carter's face at least. Jack waved at them, reassuring. "And you're completely different, colonel?" Rothman smiled, bitterly. "Somehow, I find that hard to believe." "If Daniel could put up with me," Jack replied, "I'm sure you can." "Well, as you keep reminding me," Rothman said, "I'm not Daniel." Jack sighed. This conversation was quickly spiralling out of his control. For the entire team's safety, he needed Rothman to trust him, to trust all of them. But if he couldn't make that happen, what then? "You're not." Jack schooled his voice to be calm, despite the anger and sadness that welled inside him at his own words. "I'd give anything if he was here instead of you, Rothman. Anything." Rothman was silent for a moment, frowning. "I know, colonel," he said. "I wish Daniel was here instead of me as well - you're not the only one who misses him." "He trusted me, Rothman. Maybe trusting me isn't such a good idea after all." Strangely, the reverse psychology seemed to work - Rothman frowned a little more, then suddenly he began to laugh. "Daniel always was a pretty good judge of character, colonel. If he thought you were okay, then he was probably right." "Probably?" "Well, he was also a great believer in giving people a second chance." Jack nodded, knowing the truth of that. After all, he hadn't made such a great impression on Daniel when they had first met, he was sure of that, but Daniel had persevered with him. He had chipped away at Jack, worn him away over the time they were together on Abydos, and their time together recently had merely built on that foundation. "And you?" "I take people as they come, colonel," Rothman said. "I've no reason to believe you're any different from the other Air Force people I've met, apart from Daniel's friendship with you. But I'm choosing to believe he was right about you, until I get proved wrong." "Thank you," Jack said. "I think...."
In the end, they'd done little more than kiss, Jack being concerned about Daniel not over-exerting himself, despite Daniel's protestations that he was fine. They'd taken advantage of the size of Jack's couch, stretching out on it together to watch TV, until Daniel had fallen asleep in the middle of a hockey game. He'd woken when the TV went off, jerking slightly until Jack's arm pulled him back to where he was resting. "Going somewhere?" Daniel relaxed at the joking tone in Jack's voice. "Or have you decided you'd be more comfortable in a real bed?" Daniel paused, wondering if this was a trick question. As much as he wanted to share a bed with Jack, as much as it had been something that he'd dreamt about for a while, he wasn't sure he was ready for that step. It seemed so final, something from which there was no way back. "Bed sounds good," he said, neutrally, hoping that Jack would pick up on his careful choice of words. "You don't have to do anything you're not comfortable with, Daniel." "I know. It's just... yesterday we were just friends." "Yesterday I thought you were dead, Daniel," Jack said. "Everything else is chicken feed." "Bed, then?" Daniel said, grabbing hold of the back of the couch and using his grip to pull himself off of where he was lying across Jack. Swinging his feet down onto the floor, he turned, looking back to where Jack was still lying, his expression unreadable. "Or were you planning to sleep here?"
Rothman looked a little more comfortable with him now, Jack decided, still keeping a weather eye out for him. Teal'c was doing a good job of looking scary, as instructed, and Jack was sure that the Jaffa's presence and general air of meanness had kept them from encountering some of the rougher side of this prison planet. Things that none of them would have appreciated, that was for sure. But the question still remained - how to get away from here? Carter was making nice with one of the locals, a woman who seemed to know more than she was letting on, but patience had never been one of Jack's strong points. He needed to be doing something, anything, to help his team get home. It struck him that he was now thinking of Rothman as part of SG-1, albeit reluctantly. Jack wondered whether he had some personality quirk, something that made him feel protective towards wayward civilians, whether he liked it or not. At first he had thought that Rothman was just a geekier version of Daniel, but now he was beginning to see the differences between the two men. Daniel had an inner strength, a persistence - Rothman was inclined to give up a little earlier than Jack was comfortable with. But was it fair to judge Rothman by Daniel anyway? Surely both had their strengths and weaknesses? He'd meant what he'd said earlier, Jack realized. He would give anything to have Daniel here with him now. Jack would forgive him all the things that used to bug him like crazy, tolerate all the lengthy explanations about stuff he neither knew about nor cared to know. Anything, to have Daniel here with him.
The next morning, they had headed off together, back to the SGC - Daniel to see Dr. Fraiser again, Jack to tackle some of the mountain of paperwork that was currently trying to take over his office. It had been a reluctant parting at best, Jack leaving Daniel behind in the infirmary with a small smile on his face, the slowness of his exit showing his reluctance to be parted from him. "You seem much better this morning, Daniel," Janet remarked, taking his blood pressure. "I feel much better," Daniel said, smiling. "Being back must agree with you. The colonel certainly looks happier as well." Daniel just nodded, uncertain of anything to say that would not imply more than he wanted anyone to know. They hadn't spoken about what they would tell people at work, but there was no sense in buying trouble. Though he knew there was such a thing as doctor-patient confidentiality, Janet was also an Air Force officer, and Daniel wasn't sure where the two things overlapped. And it wasn't exactly the kind of thing you could just drop into a conversation, was it? What would it be like being back in SG-1, Daniel wondered, now that things had changed so fundamentally between him and Jack? He hadn't spent much time with Sam or Teal'c after his unexpected return, just long enough to assure them he was really okay, on his way down to the infirmary. Jack hadn't allowed him to linger, his hand still gripping Daniel's arm even as Daniel paused to speak with them. He wondered what they thought about that, Jack's impatience written large in every line of his body, even as Daniel had tried to explain what had happened. In the end, he had just said he'd see them some time soon and tell them everything, before Jack half-pulled him away once more.
Despite everything, they were suddenly in danger almost before they even knew it. A misplaced word from Rothman led to an eruption of violence, Jack being forced to try and intervene as Rothman was pinned against the 'Gate, one hefty hand gripped tightly around his throat. From where he was being held by a couple of people in the crowd, Jack could still see Rothman's face redden, the futile pulling at the other man's hands, the way his legs kicked in the small space between his assailant and the 'Gate. As he saw Rothman begin to go limp in his attacker's hold, Jack threw himself against the hold the others had on him with renewed fury. After a second or two, he managed to break the grip of one of them, turning and smashing his fist into the other one's face with all the strength he could muster. Whatever happened to him, he couldn't allow another member of his team to die without having done something to try and stop it from happening! The second man had recovered from his surprise, grabbing Jack by the arm and pulling him off-balance. They tussled for a moment, no thought in Jack's mind concerning whatever he could do - all the unarmed combat he had studied seemed to have been replaced momentarily by the instinct for sheer survival, for protection. "Enough!" The voice cut through the squabble like a knife, making Jack's opponent freeze. Jack took the opportunity this presented to shake off his grip, crossing over to where Rothman was lying. Though red in the face, his breath coming shakily, Jack was delighted to see that Rothman was alive, focussing blearily on him. "I'll get you out of here," Jack said, for a moment not sure whether he was talking to Rothman or to Daniel. He'd almost promised the same thing, back on Apophis' ship, only for Daniel to tell him to go, and the similarity of the situation struck him. Could he keep this promise any more than the one he had wanted to make back then?
By the time Janet had given him a clean bill of health, Daniel was starting to feel hungry. As he headed in the direction of the messhall, he wondered whether he could persuade Jack to come and have lunch with him - just as he was about to make a detour via Jack's office, Daniel turned a corner and almost ran into Sam. "Daniel?" Sam said, delighted. "Janet let you out already?" "I'm fine, Sam. Just a little tired." "The colonel looked after you, though?" Sam continued, pausing as Daniel felt himself redden at her words. "Daniel?" "Want to go get some lunch?" Daniel asked, unwilling to have this conversation in the corridor. Even the messhall promised a little more privacy than the curious looks they were currently getting from just about everyone who passed them. "Should we ask the colonel if he wants to join us?" Sam asked, grinning. "Sam!" "Forget I said anything," Sam said, her grin still there. "I hear today's special is meatloaf." "Oh, is it Wednesday already?" Daniel asked, smiling back at her now. They walked together in silence through the corridors, just glad to have the chance to spend time together. Daniel noticed something he hadn't seen before, though he'd travelled these corridors for months now - every so often there, on one of the doors they passed, was a new symbol. It looked a little like a corkscrew, Daniel decided, as he passed the third such door. Oh well, he thought, maybe I just haven't been paying enough attention....
Linea had helped them, in return for safe passage from the prison planet. Even at the time Jack had been suspicious of her motivations, but no-one would tell them why she was there, and she was not at all forthcoming herself. Besides, Carter seemed to be really taken with her, discussing sub-atomic particles and all that geeky stuff that fascinated her and made Jack wish he was on another planet entirely. And Rothman was fine. He would be croaking for a few days, but that was hardly surprising - he must have come far closer to being choked to death than Jack cared to think about, and he'd had to tolerate having Teal'c as a personal bodyguard for a little while in case his attacker had tried to finish what he'd started. When the truth had come out about Linea, Jack hadn't been surprised. He'd been pleased that nothing too bad had happened when she made her escape, that she hadn't used her undoubted genius to kill them all in the same way she had apparently been responsible for the death of millions. What could they have done to stop her had that been her intention? But now Jack had to try and figure out what the hell was happening. Rothman's brush with death seemed to have affected Jack more deeply than he cared to think about. More so, in fact, than it had Rothman, who seemed to have shaken the experience off as 'just one of those things'. Jack was secretly quite impressed by how he was handling it, though he'd never give Rothman the satisfaction of telling him. Just what he needed on his team, an over-confident geek. Though he was starting to wonder. Jack thought about his reaction to Rothman being attacked, the realization starting to creep in that he was making a great deal out of someone he didn't even like being injured. Was he mixing Daniel and Rothman up, trying to protect Rothman in a way that Daniel had never allowed him to do? Jack could have cited loads of occasions when he wished Daniel hadn't run headfirst into trouble without asking for his opinion on whether he was doing the right thing. But all of those had just been part and parcel of who Daniel was, the things that made him different, special. The things that infuriated and delighted Jack in equal measure if he allowed himself to admit the truth. He had loved Daniel in his own clumsy way, never exactly knowing what it was about him that had him so hooked. Not being someone who was majorly into introspection, Jack was uncomfortable with trying to analyze his feelings for Daniel, even more so now there seemed to be no point to it. What did it matter whether he had loved Daniel now he wasn't around to allow Jack to do anything about it?
This was awful. Torture worse than the Goa'uld could devise. Sam was watching him, her eyes knowing, determined to pry from him whatever secrets she could. Daniel looked down at his plate, wondering what the hell was on it, all the time hoping that if he ignored her she might go away? "Daniel?" No such luck. "There's nothing to tell, Sam," Daniel said, for the third time. Nothing I plan to tell you, anyway, he thought, smiling to himself. As good a friend as Sam was, there were some things that Daniel didn't feel able to tell her, and the details of whatever it was that was now going on between him and Jack firmly fit into that category. Besides, it was difficult for him to tell her anything, when he wasn't even sure what there was to tell. Jack had surprised him and he had surprised himself. He had entertained so many hopes and dreams where Jack was concerned that when he found one of them coming true all of a sudden, it was overwhelming. That Jack could want him, that he had managed to conceal that desire under his on-going friendship - it was like waking up and discovering it was suddenly Christmas morning and there were unexpected gifts waiting for you. Daniel smiled at the thought. "You're killing me here, Daniel," Sam said, shoving her unfinished plate to one side. "You look like the cat that got the cream. What's going on with you and the colonel? What are you two up to?" Daniel just shook his head, and stayed silent.
"General?" Jack said, knocking on the doorframe of Hammond's office. "A word?" "Come on in," Hammond said, beckoning Jack to enter. "Close the door." Jack obeyed, then came to a halt in front of Hammond's desk, standing at ease. "Is there something wrong, colonel?" Hammond asked, frowning up at him. "I'd like to request some leave, sir," Jack said. He needed to get the words out as soon as possible, making them fall over one another in their haste. "Some down time." "Any particular reason?" "Does there have to be a reason, sir?" Jack asked. He saw by the expression on Hammond's face that glib was clearly not the way to go, but it was too late to take the words back. "Are you sure there's no problem, Jack?" Jack winced slightly - Hammond only called him that when he was concerned, trying to put the general to one side and attempt man to man. "Just tired, sir," he replied. "That's all. Nothing a little fishing won't cure." Hammond looked unconvinced, his perceptive eyes seeming to read Jack's soul as he looked up at him. "Very well, colonel," he said, after a moment's silence. "You have 72 hours. Remember there's a briefing session for SG-1's next mission on Monday, oh-eight-hundred hours." "Thank you, sir," Jack replied, and beat a hasty retreat. Outside Hammond's office, Jack relaxed. Fishing, that was the thing. It would give him a chance to try and get back in control of his wayward thoughts, try and marshal them into some kind of order before he went completely off the rails.
He hadn't seen Jack all day, and wondered in the elevator up to the surface whether Jack was avoiding him. Could he possibly know that Sam had tried to interrogate him, Daniel wondered, and was choosing not to be seen in the same place till the fuss died down? Whatever the explanation, driving home alone was something Daniel found a little depressing. He wondered exactly what he would find living in his fridge when he got back to his apartment, let alone how much mail might have piled up in his absence, brief though it was. When he finally got in, he glanced over at the answering machine, but the light was steady, seeming to mock him with his lack of messages. If Jack was going to be elusive at work, wasn't going to come see him at home, the least he could do was leave a message explaining why. Or was that being unreasonable? Daniel considered this as he tentatively opened the fridge door. Surprisingly, nothing looked too out of date, no new civilizations seemed to have been formed from the fridge's contents since he had been away. Daniel sniffed the milk cautiously and then wished he hadn't. As he was removing the carton from the fridge, the doorbell rang. Once he had dumped the carton in the sink, Daniel answered the door, his smile growing as he saw it was Jack. "What is that smell?" Jack asked, his nose wrinkling almost before he was even in the apartment. "Milk," Daniel said, going back into the kitchen to deal with it. "Or it used to be." Jack followed him, his movements a shadow of Daniel's the day before. This time it was Daniel who found himself being embraced, as Jack wrapped his arms around him as he washed the sour milk down the drain. Daniel could feel Jack's erection, pushing against his ass as he was sandwiched between the sink and one determined colonel. Jack moved slightly, his hips moving gently against Daniel, and Daniel felt himself start to harden. He jumped, as Jack licked his neck, one long stroke from the collar of his shirt up to just behind his ear. Despite Daniel's sudden movement, Jack did not hesitate, nipping gently with his teeth as he reached his destination. Daniel had always been sensitive there, and the slight pressure of teeth and mouth combined made him moan. He felt Jack chuckle at his response, a low growling sound that made him harden even more. "Aren't we in the wrong room?" Jack asked, rubbing gently against Daniel once more. "Bedroom?" "Now you're talking."
If he had hoped that the solitude would make things clearer, Jack soon discovered he was mistaken. His sleep was plagued with dreams of Daniel, dreams where he berated Jack for his failure to save him, where he mocked Jack's exclamations that he cared, laughing as his life drained away. Jack woke shaking, and didn't attempt to sleep any more that night. When sunrise came, Jack went out to the lake. The surface was placid, seeming to mock him, his troubled sleep still fresh in his mind. How had he ever believed that he could walk away from his feelings so easily? The strength of his dreams alone must surely prove that theory false? Was he now destined to suffer this way forever, because of a choice he made, two choices in fact - to keep silent and to leave someone behind. Jack had lived by a different code, something drummed into him since his time in Iraq. No-one gets left behind. No-one. But when it had come to the crunch, when Daniel had needed him, he had thrown that aside, doubly betraying him. Doubly damning himself. Jack sighed, resting his head on his crossed arms as he sat on the dock overlooking the lake. There would be no peace for him now and he looked for none - if there was any to be found, it would be more than he deserved.
Daniel woke and found he had draped himself over Jack in his sleep, his face pressing into the warm expanse of Jack's back. This was good. He liked this. The casual intimacy of it warmed Daniel as much as the heat of Jack's skin. He made himself relax once more, closing his eyes. It wasn't as if this was Daniel's first relationship with another man, but the last time it had been much more casual, and much less intimate. Just a little messing around at college, two guys getting off in each other's company, rather than something that had naturally grown from the friendship he and Jack already shared. Something that felt long-term, something that promised the stability Daniel had always craved. Searching for sleep again, Daniel slowly rubbed his face against Jack, revelling in the closeness. "Mmm?" "Go back to sleep, Jack," Daniel said quietly, then listened as Jack's breathing evened out beneath him once more.
Briefings were the bane of his life, Jack decided, sitting through yet another one. Sleep had been elusive over the weekend - after the first night, Jack had been reluctant to trust that he would not dream again, and had only tried to sleep when exhaustion was creeping up on him. Consequently, what little sleep he'd managed had been disturbed, giving him little benefit. Jack tried to focus on the matter at hand, forcing himself to concentrate on the MALP telemetry in his mission folder. Nice big structure, clearly alien, but no signs of life. He could feel Hammond watching him, but he was tired. Maybe a little too tired to manage to hide his true situation, Jack decided, then tried to appear more enthused than he actually was. Next to him, Carter was holding forth on the likely problems of this mission, and Jack tried to focus on her words, but they eluded him, slipping through his mind. Hers wasn't the voice he wanted to hear, needed to hear. "A word, colonel," Hammond said, dismissing the rest of them when the briefing finally ended. Jack had been halfway out of his chair, but obediently sat, ignoring the glances the others gave him as they left. He hated this. It was too much like being kept back after class. "Colonel?" "Sir?" Jack replied, forcing himself to pay attention. "Should I be sending you to the infirmary, rather than on this mission?" "No, sir." Jack looked at Hammond, seeing by the set expression that he was in serious trouble. "I'm fine." "You keep saying that," Hammond said, "and maybe if I saw any evidence of that, I might believe you." Jack could feel the precipice opening up either side of him. What would he do if Hammond had Fraiser declare him medically unfit for duty? The thought of it was enough to make his stomach churn anxiously. He had nothing else, he needed to keep working, to keep looking for Sha're. "Yes, sir." Hammond watched him for a long moment in silence, until Jack toyed with the idea of just getting up and walking away, regardless of the consequences. It felt like the general could see through him, those pale bright eyes examining the nooks and crannies of his soul and not altogether liking what they found there. "I need to do this," Jack said, suddenly, though he'd never intended to plead for mercy in any way. "I can see that, colonel," Hammond replied. He looked at Jack in silence for a moment. "Go, join your team."
Life settled back into an easy routine, one that Daniel had found comforting over the past few months. Missions came and went, some more exciting than others, the undercurrent of desire that flickered between him and Jack making Daniel slightly less interested than he used to be in long hours in his office alone. He still worked long hours, but Jack was there too, more than willing to drag him out of his office. Daniel would be reluctant, but it wouldn't take much to persuade him to go home, not really. There was an ease to it, Daniel decided, half-asleep on Jack's couch and leaning against Jack as he watched the late news. As if they had been doing this all their lives and had only just now realized it. It was comforting, reassuring, and frighteningly normal. Somehow, Daniel kept expecting life to throw him a curveball. Since when had it ever been this straightforward for him?
Stepping through the 'Gate into brilliant sunshine, Jack paused a moment at the top of the familiar steps to put on his shades. Beside him, he could hear Rothman sniff quietly, a sound he was almost becoming able to tune out, so used was he to it now. The guy must have some serious problems with his adenoids, but if Dr. Fraiser had okayed him for active duty, then who was he to argue? "Nice," Jack said, looking out over the manicured lawns and well- maintained beds. "The MALP showed no sign of anyone, sir," Carter said, following his gaze. "Someone has to come tend this, Carter." Carter nodded, looking down at whatever gadget she was holding. Jack ignored her movement, wishing that this mission was over. If Sha're wasn't here, he really was finding it difficult to care what other discoveries they might make. Rothman suddenly sneezed, only long years of training stopping Jack from jumping at the sudden noise. "Flowers?" Rothman nodded, wiping his nose. "What did you expect in a garden, Rothman? Let's just keep an eye out for snakes, okay?"
Daniel frowned at his translation. For some reason, his brain just didn't seem to be working the way he was used to this morning. Instead of running through this relatively easy translation in a matter of minutes, allowing him then to move on to examine the artifacts SG-7 had picked up on their last mission, he kept hesitating, suddenly uncertain. Was it ungrateful to feel so unsettled? Surely, Daniel decided, he should be happier than he was? After all, hadn't he finally got what he always wanted? But now, it seemed, he wasn't satisfied with even that. Daniel screwed his eyes tightly shut and then opened them again, looking down at the words scrawled across the pad in front of him once more. No. They were still there. He'd translated this before. Daniel couldn't remember exactly when it had been, but there was a certain turn of phrase in this particular passage he was currently deciphering that had seemed oddly familiar. He took off his glasses and rubbed his eyes tiredly. Maybe it was just deja vu? A knock on the door heralded the arrival of Jack. "Lunch time, Daniel. Don't make me carry you again...." Daniel smiled, thinking back to that incident. He hadn't been willing to leave behind what he was working on, and Jack had objected, then made him leave. He put his pen down beside the pad, then looked at the translation again as he stood and shrugged on his jacket. Strange. Very strange.
Like the MALP's transmissions had indicated, it seemed as though the planet they were currently exploring was deserted. If so, Jack decided, looking across the neat gardens, that departure must have been recent. Unless there were machines here to tend the grounds, some kind of robotic gardeners, there had to have been someone here. They had arrived at the structure they had seen on the probe's video footage, the natural destination. It was warm inside, the sunshine streaming in, the air moist and heavy. In all, it reminded Jack of some of his more unpleasant missions, trudging through rain forest in the service of his country. But it was silent. No sign of birdlife or animals, the silence inside the domed structure was almost oppressive, intimidating, forcing them to almost speak in whispers. It was also very green, very lush, great lolling plants overhanging every path, their huge leaves wet with dew. "Stay alert, people," Jack said, having to force himself to speak up. The silence made him feel as though he was shouting in a church, and it irritated him. They turned a corner in the path they were following, a trail that seemed to be leading them to the center of the structure, if the curve of the ceiling was anything to go by. There, in a small clearing in front of them, were a number of machines of some kind, all metal and tubes. Carter walked past him, already switching mentally from soldier to scientist. Jack watched her, senses also alert for any sign of movement from around them, as she circled round the machines, her eyes examining them avidly. "Any idea what they are, Carter?" "No, sir." Carter had disappeared behind the devices now, though Jack could see the top of her head as she slowly moved along behind them, stopping for a moment to lean closer and examine the machine in more detail. Jack moved a little closer as Carter came back into view. She shrugged as she looked at him, clearly eager to make a more intimate examination of the machines. Jack nodded, the unspoken message that she needed to be careful passing between them. Carter nodded in response, smiling slightly, before turning back to the devices. When it moved, pulling Carter in, Jack was startled for a moment, then leapt forward to try and pull at the tubes that wrapped her so tightly. He was so fixed on his task that it took a moment before he realized that he too had been trapped, pulled backward into the embrace of the next device along the line. Jack heard Teal'c yell something, then the darkness took him, even as he felt the tubes wrap themselves around his chest and legs, embracing him snugly.
This was all seeming really familiar now, deja vu multiplied by ten. The last mission had been so like their trip to Cimmeria, that Daniel had to stop himself from asking for Gairwyn when they arrived. The runes were the same, carved in prominent places, the people dressed so similarly that for a moment he thought that they had made a mistake. Had they travelled somewhere that they had already visited by accident? But there was no hammer-shaped stone standing guard over the 'Gate, no labyrinths, it seemed, hiding the mysteries of the Asgard. Just a bunch of people who happened to be descended from the Vikings of Earth. Daniel considered this as he noted down another set of runes. Of course, it wasn't completely impossible that the Asgard had put people on more than one planet, but it seemed a little strange that they were here without the protection that the Hammer had given. "Daniel?" Jack's voice came over the two-way radio. "You just about done?" Daniel hesitated, marking the last set of runes down before he replied. "Daniel?" "Time to go home?" "You got it. Get yourself back to the 'Gate, Daniel."
When he opened his eyes, Jack realized immediately where he was. This place had been the scene of so many nightmares. So many regrets. They had stood, the four of them, looking out into a great dark expanse of space, knowing now that the ship on which they travelled was headed inexorably to Earth. It was Daniel's nightmare journey to another reality come to life. But how could this be? Was it some kind of time machine? Had he somehow been transported back to the ship? Carter and the others were looking at him, expectantly, waiting for him to say something. "Watch our backs," Jack said to Daniel, heading into the control room to confront Klorel. Carter gave Daniel her MP5 and then she and Teal'c followed him. As he remembered it from before, the battle was brief and bloody, Klorel being pulled away from where he was torturing Bra'tac, zat blasts arcing across the room. Serpent guards fell, and they were victorious. As he shot the Guards, Jack heard Daniel call his name, and froze for the briefest of moments. What the hell had he been thinking, Jack wondered, telling Daniel to watch their backs? It hadn't worked last time, so how could he expect that this time would be different? Any other choice would have been more sensible, making Carter or Teal'c stay behind just in case would have been a more logical selection. Instead he had chosen Daniel again, ignoring the surprised expression on his face. Was it because he didn't want to take Daniel into danger? Even now, after the weeks and months that had passed since it actually happened, Jack couldn't quite work out his own thinking. Whatever the reason, it had been the wrong decision, Jack thought, as he headed out into the corridor in search of Daniel. Nothing had changed. Daniel was still slumped there like Jack remembered, his eyes bright, the smell of burnt flesh hanging round him as the wound on his shoulder oozed. Jack felt the ice begin to grow around his heart at the sight of him. What was this? Dream, nightmare? "Daniel." Shoving his MP5 behind him, Jack knelt by Daniel's side, taking in the slightly dazed expression on Daniel's face, the ragged breaths. No, he thought. Not again. "This will not do." The voice came from behind him, making Jack jerk round to its source. An angular man, dressed in flowing robes and an oddly-shaped headdress was frowning at him, lips pursed in disapproval. "Who the hell are you?" Jack asked, bringing his automatic weapon round to bear on the intruder. "Just get out of here, Jack," Daniel said, his voice breaking. "You can change this," the newcomer said. "And as for who I am - I am the Keeper, of course." "The keeper?" Jack echoed. "You're just going to blow up with the other ship," Daniel continued, seemingly unaware of the conversation Jack was having. And where was everyone else, anyway? Shouldn't they have come looking for him by now? "The Keeper of all that was, is and could yet be," the newcomer said, with a small bow. "Have you never wished to change the things that have happened?"
Daniel had stowed his pad in his fatigues pocket and headed back to rendezvous with the others at the 'Gate, as ordered. As he entered the clearing where it stood, he could see Jack watching for his arrival, Sam standing by the DHD ready to dial home and Teal'c was standing guard over the three of them. "Got everything you came for?" Jack asked, walking to meet Daniel. Daniel nodded. "Dial it up, Carter." Sam nodded, looking down at the DHD then and concentrating on entering the correct order of glyphs - Daniel saw the orange light that bathed her face as she rested her hand on the central crystal. "Have you noticed anything strange about the last couple of planets we've visited?" Daniel asked, he and Jack headed towards the 'Gate together. It shimmered now with an open wormhole, the event horizon glistening with blue opacity. "Strange?" "Like we've done this before." "Nope." Daniel glanced across at Jack, the shortness of his response something of a surprise. "Can we go now?"
"What?" "To change the past," the Keeper continued. "To right that which once was wrong, to change the way things occurred." As he spoke, he looked at Daniel, who still lay slumped against the wall, his lips moving as if he was still urging Jack to go. Jack followed the Keeper's gaze, his heart clenching at the sight. "Who hasn't?" Jack asked, looking back at the Keeper once more. "Very good." The room seemed to swirl around him and then Jack found himself back in the corridor once more, watching Bra'tac head into the control room, confrontation on his mind. Jack paused for a moment, considering his next move. What had to change to make things turn out differently? Could this change how things were? Somehow change the path that he and Daniel had taken? Give the two of them another chance? He had no idea whether this really was some kind of time machine, whether his actions here could affect the way things were, but Jack knew he had to try. "Carter," he said. "Watch our backs." Carter nodded, bringing her MP5 up and moving to take Daniel's place, facing up the corridor. "Daniel, you're with me." Daniel nodded, pulling his pistol from its holster, his face tense. Jack turned back to the entrance now, hearing Bra'tac's defiant words to Klorel. The next few minutes were a blur of motion, though he was always conscious of Daniel's presence with him, firing at the guards in the room. Just as the last of them fell, he heard a gasp. Turning sharply, Jack was just in time to see Daniel crumple, one hand outstretched towards him. "NO!" The Keeper materialised at that moment, turning from Bra'tac into the man he was quickly coming to despise, as Jack fell to his knees beside Daniel. "Get out of here, Jack." "I'm not leaving you." "You're just going to blow up on the other ship." Jack could feel Teal'c's presence looming over him, then a sound of footsteps told him that Carter was there as well. Jack looked up, searching for the Keeper's eyes. "This isn't what happened." "Should you wish to try again..." the Keeper began. "Damn you, this wasn't how it was meant to be!" Jack heard his voice echo around the chamber and the anger in his words startled him a little. Was this real or not? Had he changed anything or nothing? "You have it within you to change this moment," the Keeper continued.
"You mean you haven't noticed anything?" Daniel asked. Jack rounded on him in the corridor, the speed of his reaction making Daniel take an instinctive step backwards. "Didn't I say that, Daniel?" This was a side of Jack that Daniel had only seen rarely, and didn't like seeing any time. There was a harshness to his voice that spoke of tiredness and Daniel tried to smile, his hands making placatory gestures. "I'm sorry," he said. "We should just get to the infirmary before Janet sends out a search party." Jack nodded, curtly and turned back in the direction they had been going, pausing for a moment to allow Daniel to fall into step with him once more. Daniel watched Jack out of the corner of his eye, considering what had just happened. He'd only asked an innocuous question, yet Jack had snapped. What the hell was going on?
This time, Jack took a little longer to decide, making both Daniel and Carter stay behind, unwilling to risk Daniel but not trusting him not to get himself killed if he stayed behind unassisted. Jack saw the way Daniel looked at him as he made his decision, the answering frown on Carter's face annoying him as well. "Keep him safe, captain," Jack said, ignoring the way Daniel's frown grew. He didn't care what Daniel thought, Daniel's safety was more important than him being happy with Jack's command decisions. Carter nodded, her eyes showing that she understood far more than Jack had ever realized. Together with Teal'c, Jack burst into the control room, weapons already firing. This time, however, things didn't go according to plan. He saw Bra'tac on his knees before Klorel, beginning to shake under the onslaught of the hand device and headed that way, determined to rescue the old man. No matter his faults, a short temper being one of them, Jack respected him and knew that Teal'c regarded him as a second father. He felt the zat gun blast before he realized he was hit, slumping against the side of the sarcophagus. When his head stopped spinning, Jack realized that things had gone drastically awry. He was pulled to his knees in front of a smiling Klorel, no trace of the young man Jack had known on Abydos in his eyes. "Kneel before your god," said the strange echoing voice. "Feel the wrath of Klorel." Faintly, Jack heard himself scream before blackness took him.
Having made his excuses, Daniel didn't hang around in the infirmary, but headed back to his office, his mind already half on the work that was waiting for him. Why hadn't he noticed that Jack was so tense recently? That it didn't seem to take much for him to take offense? He settled himself back at his desk, turning over the papers there with a semblance of attention, but his mind was elsewhere. Something isn't right, Daniel thought. But what? The sound of the door opening brought him back to the present and he turned to face Jack, as he knew it had to be. "Is everything okay?" Daniel asked. "Shouldn't it be?" Jack asked, coming to stand closer than Daniel liked. It made him crick his neck, looking up at Jack, and this unsettled him. It was one thing to be this close away from the base, but there was too much at stake here, too much chance of discovery. And there was something in Jack's expression that unnerved him a little, an edge Daniel hadn't seen there before. Jack smiled down at him. "I don't know. You tell me." "I think you're working too hard," Jack said. Daniel blinked at the sudden change of subject. "Maybe I should take your mind off it?" "Are you sure that's a good idea, Jack?" Daniel asked, swallowing a little nervously. There was something almost predatory in Jack's expression, a look that both made him feel aroused and frightened, those emotions running seamlessly together. "Anyone could walk in on us." "Now that's easily fixed," Jack said, going back to the door and locking it. Daniel took this opportunity to shove his chair back and stand. When Jack turned back to him, his eyes intent, Daniel felt himself harden even more, pulsing heat signalling the departure of blood from his brain to points further south. "I have a lot of work to do, Jack," Daniel continued, some reckless part of himself wanting to play this charade to the end. "Like I said, Daniel, you work too hard." Jack was close now, close enough that he must be able to feel Daniel's arousal, to smell it. A hand snaked between the two of them, brushing over Daniel's groin. "I see that's not the only thing that's hard around here," Jack continued, smiling. Jack edged forward, trapping Daniel between himself and his desk. Daniel could feel the edge of it pressing into the back of his legs, the answering hardness in Jack's fatigues pressing against him. His mouth was suddenly dry, Daniel realized, and he felt himself blink nervously at Jack. Jack's fingers were tugging at his fly now, insinuating themselves between the buttons in search of heat. Daniel bit down on a moan as they made contact, feeling himself arch against Jack, heat against heat. Suddenly it was all too much, the intensity almost searing, and Daniel began to panic slightly, pushing Jack away from him with all the strength he could muster. "Stop," he gasped, frowning as Jack persisted. "I said stop, Jack." "You know you don't mean that." Jack hissed the words into Daniel's ear, breath warm and intimate. "No, really," Daniel persisted, pushing him away now. "Stop." He felt the loss of contact as Jack's fingers slipped from him, the lack of sensation striking Daniel like a blow. Jack stepped back, frowning at him, as he wiped his hands on the leg of his fatigues. "What the hell is wrong with you?" he snapped. "You were into this. Tell me you didn't want this as much as I did, Daniel?" Daniel looked down, suddenly deciding that his office floor held great interest for him. It was bound to happen some time, Daniel decided. Things had been too good between them for too long, maybe now it was time for the universe to get some kind of revenge on him, for things to start acting like they usually did. He heard Jack's angry hiss of breath, then the sound of footsteps crossing to his door. When Daniel looked up, he was alone.
"I won't do this," Jack said to the currently-invisible Keeper, finding himself back in the corridor once more. "It isn't working! None of this is real, is it?" The others looked at him strangely as he peered intently at each of them, wondering which one would turn into the Keeper this time. "You must continue." It was Teal'c - incongruously the voice was the Keeper's, even if the facial expressions were still those of the Jaffa. He blinked as Teal'c suddenly changed. "And if I don't?" Jack asked, watching as the rest of his team, including Teal'c, who had reappeared, tried to take the control room. He turned his back on Daniel, who had been left to guard their escape. He couldn't bear to watch what he feared would happen next - coming across the results of the attack had been bad enough. "You have been given a challenge to be met and conquered," the Keeper persisted. "You have it in you - why will you not partake?" Jack heard the guards advancing up the corridor - the rattle of automatic weapons fire and the sound of staff weapons responding told him Daniel had seen them too. "Because nothing works. This is all some sort of game, isn't it?" "Jack!" Daniel calling for him almost made him turn, but he knew what he would see and also that this was the last thing he could deal with right now. Jack concentrated on his argument with the Keeper. "You have not yet explored all your options," the Keeper continued, petulantly. There was a brief silence and then the sound of staff weapons fire again, followed by a hollow thud as Daniel hit the ground. "I won't do this," Jack said, closing his eyes. "Then I shall find something that is more in keeping with your desires," the Keeper responded. Jack watched him walk away, never daring to look back to where he knew Daniel lay, broken and bleeding. He had seen Daniel like that for real, and again now in whatever this was that the Keeper was doing, and each time it had torn a part of himself away.
He had to go in search of Jack - it seemed to Daniel that Jack was avoiding him this morning, choosing to make himself scarce in the labyrinth of corridors and rooms that was the SGC. When he eventually found him, Jack was just going into the messhall for breakfast, and he didn't look all that happy at having been discovered. "We need to talk," Daniel said, joining him in line. Jack didn't even look round at him when he spoke, nodding curtly at the words. "Don't we?" "I guess." Daniel stifled a sigh of frustration. Jack was determined to make this as difficult as possible, it seemed - strange, when it had always been Daniel who had been the stubborn one, the one who was inflexible, intractable. Maybe he'd just not realized that he had competition? "I was wrong, okay?" Daniel said, rushing out the words before he could regret their existence, or consider their surroundings. He saw Jack turn slightly to him from the corner of his eye as he looked resolutely ahead, pretending to consider the length of the line in front of them. "I don't think this is the place...." "No. You're right. I'll shut up now."
This time, it was another place he knew well, Jack realized immediately, looking up and down the corridor that led to the small office Daniel called home. He bit down on the emotions that rose within him as he headed for the door and it opened. "Jack?" "Daniel." He was lost for words. Unlike the scenario on the ship, this seemed so ordinary, so normal that Jack could almost forget that Daniel was really dead, left behind to be blown into a million pieces just inside Earth's atmosphere. "I was just coming to find you," Daniel said, glancing at his watch. "I hadn't forgotten." Jack looked at Daniel for a moment, considering what to say. This was different to the other times, it wasn't something he remembered happening. Then the Keeper's words struck home - he had said something about being the Keeper of the past, present and whatever he could imagine. Since he didn't remember this happening, and Daniel's death meant that it never could, was it something out of his own imagination? "That's okay," he said, desperate for words that would take away the worried expression on Daniel's face. "I got done quicker than I thought, so I came to find you." Daniel smiled and Jack felt his heart lurch. If this was his imagination at work, he wasn't sure whether it gave him more pleasure than pain - to see Daniel like this, looking happy and unscathed, rather than slumped injured against a bulkhead, but to know that it wasn't reality.... "Lunch?" Daniel suggested, after Jack had stared at him in silence for a moment. "Sure." Jack indulged himself in watching Daniel over lunch. After the trauma of reliving one of the worst moments of his life over and over, trying fruitlessly to change the course of events that led to Daniel's death, it was tempting just to watch Daniel eat. After a few minutes, Daniel became aware of his scrutiny, looking up with a slightly embarrassed expression on his face. "Not here, Jack," he said, then looked down again. Jack frowned, considering the words. He'd just been looking at Daniel, that was all. The question was, even here in his imagination, what did Daniel think he was doing? He thought about that for a moment, turning the idea round to examine all possible angles before deciding he had no idea what Daniel might possibly mean. "What?" Daniel looked up again. With an over-patient sigh, he placed his fork neatly down across what was left of whatever-it-was for lunch and pushed his plate away slightly. "I said, not here," Daniel repeated, enunciating the words clearly. Jack just looked at him, one hand toying with his fork as Daniel squirmed under his scrutiny. This was fun, more fun than he remembered it being when he did this for real. As far as the Keeper's games went, this was turning out to be a relatively enjoyable one. Daniel was here, in one piece, and there didn't seem to be anything that he had to do to keep him that way. Surely that couldn't last, though. Something had to happen to keep the Keeper amused. Why did he do this, anyway? Jack considered the possible reasons why someone would choose to torment people this way, stirring his fork in whatever it was had been dished up for lunch. As artificial realities went, it seemed this one had the same poorly- chosen kitchen staff as the real thing.
What was with Jack anyway? One minute he was acting like all he wanted was sex, the next, he was just staring at Daniel in silence for minutes on end as they sat over lunch. It was like he was two different people. That's just plain stupid, Daniel thought. Unless something's happened I don't know about. After all, it wouldn't be the first time we've come under some kind of alien influence. Sitting back in his chair, Daniel gave the possibility some serious thought. Jack was certainly behaving differently than how he had since they first got involved - if anything, he was more like he used to act. What had almost happened between them in this very office yesterday had been out of character as well, though, but that felt more like a natural progression from what had come before. This was like taking a step back in time, almost, to before he had been MIA. Before Daniel had been thought dead. Had Jack forgotten what had almost happened here? Repressed it somehow? That didn't seem all that likely, but Daniel had long ago learned to expect the unexpected where life at the SGC was concerned. But he couldn't tear his thoughts from what Jack had almost done, only a few hours ago. If he hadn't protested as forcibly, Daniel wondered, would Jack have persisted? Made him do something he really wasn't ready for? He'd seen the anger in Jack's face when he had pushed too hard, too fast - it wasn't as if that was an unexpected response, just one that Daniel wasn't all that used to being on the receiving end of. He knew that he could be annoying at times, he must run Jack to the thin end of his patience more times than he realized, but the last time they had been alone, Daniel knew now that he had actually been afraid. At the time, it had been mixed together with arousal, the desire in Jack's eyes tempering the fear, but now he looked back, Daniel felt the undercurrent of anxiety that had threaded its way through that encounter. If Jack hadn't wanted to stop, if he hadn't wanted to listen to what Daniel was saying, there would have been little that he could have done about it.
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| Concluded in part 3... | |