Lets get on with more Women:

Wifespeak
Facts About Women
Things You Will Never Hear A Woman Say

WIFESPEAK

FACTS ABOUT WOMEN

Women especially love a bargain. The question of "need" is irrelevant, so don't bother pointing it out. Anything on sale is fair game.

Women never have anything to wear. Don't question the racks of clothes in the closet; you "just don't understand".

Women will always ask questions that have no right answer, in an effort to trap you into feeling guilty.

Women need to feel like there are people worse off than they are. That's why soap operas and Oprah Winfrey-type shows are so successful.

Women hate bugs. Even the strong-willed ones need a man around when there's a spider or a wasp involved.

Women always go to public restrooms in groups. It gives them a chance to gossip.

Women can't refuse to answer a ringing phone, no matter what they're doing. It might be the lottery calling.

Women never understand why men love toys. Men understand that they wouldn't need toys if women had an "on/off" switch.

Women think all beer is the same.

Women keep three different shampoos and two different conditioners in the shower.

After a woman showers, the bathroom will smell like a tropical rain forest.

Women don't understand the appeal of sports. Men seek entertainment that allows them to escape reality. Women seek entertainment that reminds them of how horrible things *could* be.

If a man goes on a seven-day trip, he'll pack five days worth of clothes and will wear some things twice; if a woman goes on a seven-day trip she'll pack 21 outfits because she doesn't know what she'll feel like wearing each day.

Women do *not* know anything about cars. "Oil-stick, oil doesn't stick?"

The average number of items in a typical woman's bathroom is 437. A man would not be able to identify most of these items.

Women love to talk on the phone. A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours.

A woman will dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage, answer the phone, read a book, or get the mail.

Women do NOT want an honest answer to the question, 'How do I look?'

"Oh, nothing," has an entirely different meaning in woman-language than it does in man-language.

All women are overweight by definition, don't argue with them about it.

All women are overweight by definition, don't agree with them about it.

If it is not Valentines day, and you see a man in a flower shop, you can probably start up a conversation by asking, "What did you do?"

Women never check to see if the lid is up. They seem to prefer taking a flying butt leap towards the bowl and then chewing men out because they "left the seat up" instead of taking two seconds and lowering it themselves.

Women can get out of speeding tickets by pouting. This will get men arrested.

THINGS YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A WOMAN SAY

What do you mean today's our anniversary?

Can we not talk to each other tonight? I'd rather just watch TV.

Ohh, this diamond is way too big!

And for our honeymoon we're going fishing in Alaska!

Can our relationship get a little more physical? I'm tired of being "just friends".

Honey does this outfit make my butt look too small?

Aww, don't stop for directions, I'm sure you'll be able to figure out how to get there.

Is that phone for me? Tell 'em I'm not here.

I don't care if it is on sale, 300 pounds is too much for a designer dress.

Hey, get a whiff of that one!