EPISODE 6:
What happens: The christening party moves from The Feathers to the Royles' and Baby
David Keanu Ronan Best is soon taken upstairs so the revellers can continue drinking and
dancing. Jim and Twiggy crack a few jokes, Cheryl pigs out, Mary goes scatty, Darren tries
to sell some dodgy gear to Emma, local pensioner PJ stinks of piss and Michelle; Twiggy's new girlfriend upsets everyone. Meanwhile, upstairs, Denise tries to bond with Baby David.
Antony and Emma surprise everyone by announcing their engagement.
Others seen: Norma Speakman: LIZ SMITH, Mary Carroll: DOREEN KEOGH,
                      Joe Carroll: PETER MARTIN, Cheryl Carroll: JESSICA STEVENSON,
                      Twiggy: GEOFFREY HUGHES, Emma Kavanagh: SHERIDAN SMITH,
                      Darren Sinclair-Jones: ANDREW WHYMENT, Michelle: SALLY LINDSAY
                      PJ: JOHN DELANEY.
Not seen: Beverley Macca, Duckers, Farouq, Gianni, Gemini Astrid, Moira, Gay Gary,
                Baby Britney, Elsie(RIP).
No telly!
What they eat: A buffet.
Jim says My Arse: Sheep.
Magic moments:  MICHELLE: I was gonna tit feed Blaze but the social took her away,
                              said I weren't a fit mother.
                              BARBARA: Oh Michelle, that's terrible. 
                              MICHELLE: Well, to be honest Barb, I wasn't a fit mother. I was
                              very heavily on the piss at the time.

                              JOE: That's my daughter there.
                              PJ: The big, fat one?
                              JOE: Aye, that's the one, Cheryl. Thirteen and a half stone, she is.
                              PJ: I've never seen an arse as big as that.
                              JOE: No, you won't have done.

                              DENISE: What can I talk to him(Baby David) about?
                              DAVE: Well, you could talk to him about Trisha or Kilroy or
                              Richard and Judy.
                              DENISE: Or Esther.
                              DAVE: Or Esther.
                              DENISE: Or Rikki Lake.
                              DAVE: Or Rikki Lake. See, you've got loads to talk to him about.

CHRISTMAS SPECIAL:
What happens: It is both Christmas day and Baby David's first birthday, Dave has made him
a toy garage from a shoe box and Cheryl has bought him 200 Benson's. Barbara is nervous at the arrival of a now pregnant Emma's parents. Darren spends the day with the Royles as his mum is in hospital and his dad is in the pub, he later becomes emotional when Antony and Emma ask him to be godfather to their baby. Emma's parents; Roger and Valerie come for tea
and everyone is impressed by Valerie's Christmas present - breast implants. Roger boasts
about his wealth which seems to impress Jim, but as soon as they leave, Jim slags him off.
Jim cheers up when presented with Sky TV for Christmas.
Others seen: Norma Speakman: LIZ SMITH, Emma Kavanagh: SHERIDAN SMITH,
                      Roger Kavanagh: JOHN HENSHAW, Valerie Kavanagh: SHARON DUCE,
                      Darren Sinclair-Jones: ANDREW WHYMENT.
Not seen: Cheryl, Mary, Roger's tart, Joe Longthorne, Elsie(RIP).
What they watch: Rolf's Animal Hospital.
What they eat: Boiled eggs.
Jim says My Arse: Finger, Roger.
End theme: Merry Christmas Everybody by NOEL GALLAGHER.
Magic Moments: BARBARA: Do you think they'll want to sit down or stand up?
                              DENISE: Well remember they are vegetarians, so they'll probably
                              want to sit down.

                              NORMA: Barbara, didn't Elsie next door have implants?
                              BARBARA: No, egg plants mam.
                              DENISE: Um, Valerie, I wanted to have a breast reduction, but
                              Dave wouldn't let me.
                              BARBARA: Well, he works long hours, Denise, be fair.
                              DENISE: Yeah.

                              ROGER(on his tart): I'll tell you what, she does things to me that
                              Valerie couldn't even dream of, she lets me do things to her you
                              wouldn't even do to a farmyard animal.
                            JIM: Come on Rog, come on, you're having me on.
                              DAVE: Roger, I made a farmyard for Baby David.
                              JIM: Bloody hell, Dave!