Subjective Piece Produced 25th October 2003 by Krishna Pentayya

The Roles

There two key roles in the life span of a relationship. The actual task of the role holders is dynamic and changes at different stages of the relationship. This overview takes a brief look at these roles and their effects on one another.

 

Stage 1 - The Good Times

The relationship comprises the two key members (x and y) and middlepersons (close friend(s) or relative(s)). The role of x and y here is fairly straightforward - provide a loving, attentive environment for one another where trust and communication are vital factors. At this stage the role of the middlepersons is that of the casual onlooker whereby their presence is not a defining factor in the functioning of the relationship.

 

Stage 2 - The Bad Times

The relationship of x and y comes under strain and key factors breakdown - communication and trust. Now the role of the middleperson's change dramatically. Their role is now to provide the 'glue' in the relationship, i.e. maintain the lines of communication and provide bizarre forms of mediation. The ability to remain neutral and rational are key skills for the middlepersons for at this stage.

 

Stage 3 - The End

If relationships were cyclical then we'd have returned to stage 1, unfortunately stage 3 is sometimes the final destination. At this stage x and y no longer hold a common bond with all key factors having disintigrated thus leaving x and y as individuals.

The role of the middleperson evolves into that of a rock figure. The middleperson will generally stay loyal to either x or y (although it is possible with great skill to stay loyal to both) and provide the stability and support they require to move on. The middlepersons role will be to listen, encourage and endure emotional fits that will sometimes results in them taking the blame for the whole episode!

 

Conclusion

The middleperson would appear to be a key factor in relationships. Indeed a relationship will often include a number of middlepersons. These middlepersons will often be supported by another layer of middleperons to provide a subjective outlook on the situation.

What is unclear is whether increasing the number of middlepersons from 1 or 2 to x number has a positive or negative effect on the relationship.

 

What do you think?