A Few Words from My Diary

Peter always took me to the Danson Craft Show. This year Sarah and Matthew took me for the afternoon; it was a very hot day. I bought some dolls' house furniture, also a couple of lavender plants. They have taken to my garden quite happily.

Sunday August 12 2001

Mary Jo's friend came and took me to mass (Mary Jo is on holiday). In the evening I watched a Whoopi Goldberg and Ted Danson film. I enjoyed it very much, it was very entertaining. Now it is bedtime: cocoa, a good book and bed.

Monday August 13 2001

New specs today. Sarah came and took me to Bexleyheath to collect them.

Tuesday August 14 2001

I felt a bit upset today. My elder brother's grandson got married. I didn't know anything about it. My sister told me about it on the phone. She said it was a very grand affair. She went, also my younger brother and his wife. I didn't get an invite. I felt very hurt, but I had to accept that these things happen, I guess. I just feel very vulnerable at the moment, and am very sensitive to things when I feel I am being slighted. But I tell myself it's not such a big deal (life goes on).

Mary Jo and Sam are home again. They said they had a good time, but the weather was atrocious.

Saturday 18 August 2001

Back to routine. Went shopping today, it absolutely poured with rain. Sam has painted the side wall. He hoped the rain would not wash it all away (it didn't). It looks really good.

Thursday 23 August 2001

My first holiday without Peter. We left home about 10:30am and had a very good drive to Sibton Park. We had dinner on the way, we went to a pub called "The Coach and Horses": very good food, but I missed Peter.^[1]

Friday 24 August 2001

Sarah took us all to Folkestone today. Very hot, we (May and I) stayed on the beach most of the time, we took a picnic. Matthew had a beano, he went on everything on the fairground - if it moved he was on it.

Saturday 25 August 2001

Today, Sarah took us to Dymchurch. Nice weather, not too hot. Had a lovely day on the beach - no amusements or fairground! Matthew spent the whole day in the sea. We were all extremely tired when we got back to the chalet.

Monday 26 August 2001

We went to a bird sanctuary at Wingham. Then we went to a craft and wine centre; no crafts, no wine - the centre was shut!

Tuesday 28 August 2001

We went to Dover today. We were all disappointed. We called in on another pottery on the way home, only to discover it was a pottery that only dealt in building materials.

Wednesday 29 August 2001

Sarah took us for a country drive in the morning, lovely! They went home in the afternoon, as Matthew had a party he wanted to go to. May and I had a very quiet afternoon and evening. I went for a meander around the grounds, May had a sleep. In the evening we did our packing.

Thursday 30 August 2001

Sarah came back in the morning and brought us home. I felt very sad and disoriented coming into the house without Peter. It seemed so very empty and lonely. Unpacking was unbearable. It felt, to me, as if it was all happening again. Peter was all around me, but I knew he was gone. I must admit I spent the night wandering around and crying, but I pulled myself together as a new day dawned, and I began to cope with life again.

^[1] The party consisted of Jean, Sarah (daughter), Matthew (grandson) and May (next-door-neighbour)