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I was pretty hesitant about the idea of writing this page, as I suspected I might become the target of ridicule and disrespect.
But then I remembered that that was "just another ordinary day at the office", so I went ahead, and here it is (complete with
photographic evidence.)
Strictly speaking this page isn't about the Loch Ness Monster
(scientific name: Nessietarius-rhombocterix. sensible name: Nessie), but her cousin
Lizzie, who supposedly lives in Loch Lochy, which is next door to Loch Ness. It stems from
an experience my family had in the mid '70's.
I was four years old and we were driving from Fort William to Inverness in our little blue three-wheeler van (which, incidentally, is more embarrassing than the
rest of the story). We were alongside Loch Lochy when my parents suddenly pulled over in a right commotion. Next thing I know, my Mum
has dived out the van with her camera and my dad is staring agog into the water. I don't remember his exact words, but they would've been
something along the lines of "goodness, that appears to be the darned Loch Ness Monster".
Yes indeed: he was staring at a large unidentified grey mass cutting through the water at a fair rate of knots. There were no windows in the back of the van,
so by this time I'd unbuckled my seat and pulled myself towards the passenger window. I looked in astonishment as I saw what appeared to be a large
trunk-like tail protruding from water. As any four-year would, I yelled "Daddy, It's the Loch Ness Monster!" - making exactly the same geographical mistake
as my father had done before me. At this moment, the 'beast', apparently reacting to the shouts, subsided below the surface. (I've been kicking myself
ever since. So have my parents.)
Mum had run a good half-mile back down the loch-side so we set off up the road to turn round and collect her. My dad
raced to the nearest layby and swung the van round viciously. In the layby was a woman eating sandwiches
in her car. As my dad pulled up, he yelled, "We've seen the monster! We've seen the Loch Ness monster!". Not sure what to make
of a lunatic in a blue three-wheeled van ranting about monsters, she rapidly wound up her window, and drove off at speed in the
opposite direction.
We drove back and collected Mum, who by this time was somewhat flustered, and indeed traumatized - she had felt distinctly eerie
as she stood alongside this strange beast. So... what about the contents of that camera?! I can see the camera now - it was
as much a monster as the object in the water. It was all dials and knobs and buttons, and not a hint of the word automatic. [Oh
Kodak disposable - where were you when we needed you?] Amazingly my Mum had kept her wits about her, and instead of
firing off shots at random, she'd tried to set the picture up with the correct focus and exposure, as you had to do in those
days. And this was whilst running along the road. Consequently she was delayed in taking the crucial photo, and my shouting
had been badly timed, it transpired.
The photo was taken just as the grey object dipped below the surface, leaving just a huge wake in the water as evidence
of its presence. Here is the photo:
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Photo © copyright 1975.
I haven't electronically tampered with or manipulated this photo in any way, other than to correct contrast and brightness after the scanning process. It was scanned from the original print made from the original slide. In the scan there's a little loss of detail in the dark areas, so you might want to have a look in more detail, with some explanation. |
Clearly we were disappointed that the picture didn't show the 'monster'. It was such a rare opportunity, to see something at such close quarters, and (quite by chance) to have a camera with us. If it was to happen again today, there is no doubt that with modern equipment we would have a series of photographs, possibly a video, that would have proved quite a talking point. We still feel the photo is strong evidence for the presence of something in the water, as yet, unexplained. The wake is equivalent to something a mid-size power boat would make: not the trace of an otter or seal. It is clearly not a log or a rock - for where did it disappear to? The photo was submitted for analysis by several experts, none of whom have been able to provide a definite explanation. We still treat it with an open and intrigued mind. The tale (sic) still brings a shiver to my spine as I recall it. Although I was four, the image is as vivid as it was the day I saw it. And although it might be tempting to think the story is an elaborate fabrication on the part of my parents, how on earth could they convince a four year old to go along with the story?? why not tell me what you think? |