The History of the ISMS
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Chapter
1 - The Prologue
Over the past 30 years or more, isms have been heard nationally, all over the country; from Redroof Bridge in the north, to Penshaw Ointment in the south. However, one must be careful! If isms continue to be brandied about like this then our language will become unindated with them. But, in some ways that’s imperial to us, so disrecount that last remark.
The study of isms is never clear cut. Like most things, you have the black areas and the white areas, and in between........the green areas. To spot a genuine ism from a fake is like trying to discover which came first, the bacon or the egg? Over the past 25 years I have been working my eyes to the bone to record only genuine isms. Heaven only knows the hours of manput that have gone in. It seems like I have been collecting isms since the word dot.
It was always difficult working between tight perambulators, taking into account the various pigs and troughs in workload. I don’t know the cost per captive head, but I estimate that it must have been about ten thousand grand pounds - that’s equal to about two full-time FTE. Fortunately, most of my cash had been ring-sliced. During my research I have always tried to follow in the footsteps of the great PMc, one of the founding four-fathers of the Institution; I can't remember who the other three were! Like PMc, I would never cowtail down to anyone in my work. I was taken to court once, a few years ago, but I was acquitted because the solicitor didn’t have a case to stand on. I was also misconscrewed a few times and there is always someone not quite au pair with the situation who will try to throw a fly in to the works.
Nevertheless, I carried on rewardless, to all intensive purposes working hand over fist to establish this Institution. At the end of the day I’ll be able to put my cap on my head and say that all my isms are genuine - none of this ‘let’s double the answer by six’ rubbish adopted by some researchers.
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The History of the ISMS is copyright to S L Rottenpig-Rules and LFG
publications in association with the ISMS and JRP
