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Here's a tale of lies and deceit from my early
teenage years as a fanatical Pool supporter. It was 1971/72
and I hadn't missed a home game all season. Pool had
embarked on their defence of the Anglo-Italian Cup, and
were due to play Lanerossi Vicenza in the second of their
home ties. At the time I was an occasional member of the
Baines' Grammar under 14 cricket team, and had been
picked to play against Blackpool Grammar the same
afternoon as the Lanerossi match. I pondered on the
dilemma for some time, and in the end decided to give the
cricket a miss and go to Bloomfield Road. A suitable
excuse for my absence would be composed over the weekend.
What a good decision it turned out to be, as Pool routed the hapless Italians 10-0. Two goals in the first three minutes were devastating, and a rampant Pool destroyed the shell-shocked opposition. Quite unbelievable! Meanwhile my cricketing colleagues were a man short, and being soundly thrashed by a strong Blackpool Grammar side. I had decided for the Monday morning inquest, to tell them that I had fallen off my bike, badly bruising a knee, and had therefore been in no fit state to play. To make it more convincing. I took a purple felt pen and drew a large bruise on my kneecap, and if anybody doubted my story I would simply pull up my trouser leg and display this bruise in all its glory. Unfortunately as the day wore on it began to fade and so did my credibility. |