:: fluffy mules :: Flamingo Legs

Flamingo Legs

by Sam

Am I a flamingo or am I a woman? Hmm, let me think about that for a moment... oh I know! I am a woman: an adult whose legs support her body and get her from A to B.

Now since I walk around on my legs they have muscles. They are not vastly overdeveloped, bulging out so that passers-by have to give me extra room on the pavement, but they do enable my getting-around. I am not a Barbie doll or a supermodel, whose legs wouldn't support a sparrow never mind a fully-grown adult. And neither, obviously, am I a skinny 12 year old girl. Now I have nothing against teenage girls, having been one myself, but the world is NOT full of them, or supermodels. And birds, to my certain knowledge, do not buy boots.

So why oh why oh why oh why are boots made for people with legs the width of a matchstick?

Sure, they will hoist your leg up onto their thigh and squeeze you in there but legs need blood flow or they will eventually drop off and then your too-tight new boots will have been a waste of money anyway.     

All I want is a pair of boots that neither cut off my circulation or flop about like a pair of fisherman's waders. Can that be too much to ask??

By Sam